My Heart Instead Video (MV)

I think I know what's been going on
Driven by voices inside of my head
I wanna do right but they show me wrong
I guess I should listen to my heart instead
I'd like forgiveness but I'm owed none
I make the choices and lie in my bed
I wanna do right but they show me wrong
I guess I should listen to my heart instead
Before you judge me, take a look at yourself
I would rather work on an issue myself
Before I give up and start looking for help
But it's embarrassing when people staring cause it takes me longer
Do you know how I've felt
These people miserable
If I could, I would be invisible like that book on a shelf
I never wanted to be a person who would put my business out in the open
Doesn't take a meeting with a therapist to figure out I'm damaged and I'm broken
All those windows of opportunities got out of my reach
Couldn't stop 'em from closing
Any moment my drive is decreased then the cycle repeats and I'm like
Here we go again
Here we go again
Yeah, my canvas is blank
But I've narrowed down the banks where I'll put 7 steady streams
To provide for my children
Birthed by a beautiful woman who's wearing my wedding ring
Wasn't ready for much
Because I was such a person who'd blame it on everything
But I got to the bottom
Saw I was the problem. It's over
I'm coming for everything
I think I know what's been going on
Driven by voices inside of my head
I wanna do right but they show me wrong
I guess I should listen to my heart instead
I'd like forgiveness but I'm owed none
I make the choices and lie in my bed
I wanna do right but they show me wrong
I guess I should listen to my heart instead
After I realized all the damage I'd done
It was too late to fix any of the mistakes I made
Or take back the trouble I brung
When confrontation is the topic
I don't follow logic
If I have the option, I run
Thought I was crazy at first
But to not make things way worse
I'm just better off biting my tongue
I had to dig deep and become a better me
While wanting to quit almost everyday
Learning how to value my own life was kinda breathtaking in a good and a scary way
Used to only party during certain seasons
Now I don't need a reason to celebrate
Every new life experience that I can get; I'm jumping right on in
I won't hesitate. I won't hesitate
Yeah, my canvas is blank
But I've narrowed down the banks where I'll put 7 steady streams
To provide for my children
Birthed by a beautiful woman who's wearing my wedding ring
Wasn't ready for much
Because I was such a person who'd blame it on everything
But I got to the bottom
Saw I was the problem. It's over
I'm coming for everything
I think I know what's been going on
Driven by voices inside of my head
I wanna do right but they show me wrong
I guess I should listen to my heart instead
I'd like forgiveness but I'm owed none
I make the choices and lie in my bed
I wanna do right but they show me wrong
I guess I should listen to my heart instead