ADAM
Tell ya 'bout them sobbin' women
Who lived in the Roman days.
It seems that they all went swimmin'
While their men was off to graze.
Well, a Roman troop was ridin' by
And saw them in their "me oh my's",
So they took 'em all back home to dry.
Least that's what Plutarch says.
Oh yes!
And the women was sobbin', sobbin', sobbin'
Fit to be tied.
Ev'ry muscle was throbbin', throbbin'
From that riotous ride.
Seems they cried and kissed and kissed and cried
All over that Roman countryside
So don't forget that when you're takin' a bride.
Sobbin' fit to be tied
From that riotous ride!
They never did return their plunder
The victor gets all the loot.
They carried them home, by thunder,
To rotundas small but cute.
And you've never seen,
So they tell me,
Such downright go domesticity.
With a Roman baby on each knee
Named "Claudius" and "Brute"
SIX BROTHERS
Oh yes!
And the women was sobbin', sobbin', sobbin', passin' them nights.
ADAM
While the Romans was goin' out hobbin', nobbin'
Startin' up fights.
They kept occupied by sewin' lots of little old togas
For them tots and sayin' "someday women folk'll have rights."
GIDEON
Passin' all o' them nights.
ADAM
Just sewin'!
FRANK AND BENJAMIN
While the Romans had fights.
CALEB
"Hey listen to this"
Now when their men folk went to fetch 'em
Them women would not be fetched.
FRANK
It seems them Romans ketch 'em
That their lady friends stay ketched.
ADAM
Right, now let this be because it's true,
A lesson to the likes of you,
Rough 'em up like them there Romans do
Or else they'll think you're tetched.
SIX BROTHERS
Oh yes!
Them a women was sobbin', sobbin',
Sobbin' buckets of tears
ADAM
My pail
SIX BROTHERS
On account o' old dobbin',
Dobbin' really rattled their ears.
ADAM
Oh they acted angry and annoyed
GIDEON
But secretly they was overjoyed
ADAM
You must recall that when corralin' your steers
BROTHERS
Oh, oh, oh, oh them poor little dears.
SIX BROTHERS ADAM
Oh yes
Them a women was sobbin', sobbin', sobbin' Oh yes
Weepin' a ton Them sobbin' women.
Just remember what Robin, Robin, Robin Oh yes
Hood woulda done. Them sobbin women.
We'll be just like them but merry men Oh yes
Them sobbin' women And make 'em all merry once again.
ADAM
Them goin be a sobbin' for a while
ALL
Oh yes!
We're gonna make them sobbin' women smile!
[Thanks to kdodge13033 for correcting these lyrics]