Every second that I waste
Every moment that I taste
Every time that I want
To f*cking kill myself
Is this what I want?
Is this what I have?
Why should I keep expecting
That something change my life
This is what I never wanted to say
This is what I never wanted to face
This is how I really need to feel
This is how I really want to live
I never want to say no lie
I never want a reason why
I just wanted to feel alive
Now f*ck it, I just want to f*cking rise
I never wanted to feel alone
This is what I'm fighting for
I won't spend more in this room
I want to feel something more
This is what I never wanted to see
This is what I never wanted to heal
This is how I really need to feel
This is how I really want to live
I never want to say no lie
I never want a reason why
I just wanted to feel alive
Now f*ck it, I just want to f*cking rise
Even if my life is coming to an end
I'm not even afraid of how my life spends
I will never bend, I will just defend
'Cause anyone of you had never been my f*cking friends
This is not the end and I will not pretend
'Cause this time I can really really really really comprehend
I'm not gonna cry
I'm not gonna die
I'm just gonna live like I really meant to be
I won't hold my breath to die
I'm just gonna heal inside
I'm gonna be the greatest that I'll ever be
I won't feel the same no more
I'll be better than before
I'm taking one step further
I'm becoming way too stronger
This is what I never wanted to accept
This is what I never wanted to forget
This is how I really need to feel
This is how I really want to live
I never want to say no lie
I never want a reason why
I just wanted to feel alive
Now f*ck it, I just want to f*cking rise
And if you're standing in my way
You better know that I won't stop today
This time I really feel okay
So f*ck it, this time I won't stay at bay
I'm still looking for something
That make me feel worth it
My demons are spoken
But I rather just pay no mind
When the time is left behind
And I'm finally up to fight
I'm stopping over time
But I think I can feel alive
I had enough with that I got
With the silence on my own
I don't want to crash and burn
I just want to break
So things will never change
So I will feel no pain
With the shitty life I paid
I'll be the one you hate
Once I start again
You'll try to kill me then
Not even god
Gave me a little bit of love
This is what I never wanted to save
This is what I never wanted to give
This is how I really need to feel
This is how I really want to live
I never want to say no lie
I never want a reason why
I just wanted to feel alive
Now f*ck it, I just want to f*cking rise
And if you're standing in my way
You better know that I won't stop today
This time I really feel okay
So f*ck it, this time I won't stay at bay
But now I ask myself
If I really want to feel this way
And If this is what I think
Why am I afraid of facing it
I don't want to die
But do I want to live?
I don't want to know
I don't want to know
I don't want to think
I don't want to know
I don't want to know
I don't want to know
I don't want to rise
I don't want to know