Satan stole my contact lens
And he rode out with the dawn
You know he tried to pinch me in a fence
He forgot to mow my lawn
And I woke up next mornin'
And all my government cheese was gone
But Jesus he protected me
And kept me safe from harm
Even while all my friends
Called out in alarm
Then I woke up next mornin'
And all my government cheese was gone
I ain't no jack of all trades
And I ain't no master of none
Anybody who tells you you're finished
They ain't even begun
But if you're looking for someone to shut up and play gutar
Well, I'd be the one
So everybody wants to be a teacher
Nobody wants to learn a f*cking thing
Nobody wants to play bass guitar or drums
Everybody wants to play lead guitar and sing
Without a rhythm section
Don't you know it's sure hard to swing
Satan stole my contact lens
And he rode out with the dawn
You know he tried to trap me in a snare
But he forgot to mow my lawn
Then I woke up next mornin'
All my government cheese was gone