Broken Habit - Traumatised Lyrics

How can I feel like this?
Wounded my entire life
Seconds of agony
Hours of
Misery
Every day is a struggle
Two steps up the mountain
Four steps back
Then I tumble
I tumble
Before I go to sleep
I check the corners of every room
It's easier to sleep
When I black out
When I escape the haunting gloom
Choke the sobs into the pillow
Will I feel anything else soon?
Carve the pain out of my flesh
Fill my lungs with forgetful fumes
Lost in my head
Lost in my heart
Doomed
I'll never forgive myself
The moment passes
Back to my senses
Fumes
I can't forget my past
When I wake in a cold sweat
I check to make sure you're not there
It's easier to wake when I black out
Escaping all my nightmares
I can't tell if I'm weak or traumatized
But I can tell that I'm better than you
I'm trying now to live my own life
Haunted by a life of abuse
Everyday is a struggle
Two steps up the mountain
Four steps back
Then I tumble
I tumble
Lost in my head
Lost in my heart
Doomed
I'll never forgive myself
The moment passes
Back to my senses
Fumes
I can't forget my past
Did it make you feel strong?
Did it make you feel brave?
I was a child all alone
Did it make you feel big?
Did it make you feel strong?
Did it make you feel brave?
I was a child all alone
Did it make you feel big?
Did it make you feel strong?
Did it make you feel brave?
I was a child all alone
Lost in my head
Lost in my heart
Doomed
I'll never forgive myself
The moment passes
Back to my senses
Fumes
I can't forget my past
Everyday is a struggle
Two steps up the mountain
Four steps back
Then I tumble
I tumble
Everyday is a struggle
Two steps up the mountain
Four steps back
Then I tumble
I tumble
I tumble