BumRush - Middle of the Night Lyrics

And as I tell myself to
Keep on writing, writing the pain away I gotta
Keep on Fighting, fighting through the day until the
Battle is in my head until Night becomes day
Persistently connect until the world fades away
I will hold true to the morals in my head they will soon
Implement a system inside of the Fed up monsoon
Of the pearlescent and decorative plaques up in your room
Of the gold in your eyes, less of the desperate double doom
You chow down instead, on disinfecting the amount
Of Ghosts in your head or disrespecting word of mouth
Or throwing all your clothes out of the window
I hope you're dead
Don't wanna hear from you again, I'd rather trick another fem
Into giving and getting head, think we're together til the end
Lust disguised as love, nothing from above
Lost my hope in the dope had to cope with enough
Because I need not more and I needn't give less
Until you shoved all my hope in that last caress
You inflicted onto me, not knowing it would be the last
Flipping through the books until the sun hits your back
Wake up from this nightmare you f*cked up in
Mirrored, flipping all the blinds you lost hope with
Pillars stacking on you with the careless shit you
Filled with selfish thoughts you had to give this with
Unless a higher power tricked you to flip this shit
You would have missed the switch but consider this
We were never meant to be because you're thoughts dismiss
Any logic in your part you keep on saying through the phone
With a suspect tone, like I don't come home
To your sweet warm soul, you got me f*cked up alone
Sitting in my room hoping the moon will be enough to light my world
Cuz your pearls kept me hooked like coke, mistook I know
But it's god I know, that I'll meet one day and understand your moans
That scream to the world as I hung up the phone yeah

Because it hurts me to know that you didn't even try
Because you f*cked up once, twice, set it all aside
Because you won't fix yourself because you think you can just hide
From all the insecurities you bury deep inside
Just let me sit for a second and think it all through
And drink about all of the doubts that I would not stay true
When all along it's in your mind because I kept my cool
When the hoes and the pussy came to me I didn't choose
Because the choice was chopped already, I didn't have much to lose
When there's no gamble, scrambling to give and prove my worth
Something I shouldn't have to do since birth
I craved the need to just improve and deserve
Something better but I'll never find myself
Because I'm headed for a settled deprecation filled with doubt
Because my answers are a trance or dance with Satan deep in hell
Because I never f*cking felt like I was meant to live life
Because deep down inside is a place I'll always hide
And never will I ever find the light behind the blinds
I'll hold out, go about, my sunny day with
A slowed down woed and downed frown portrayed in
My old town stoned with "how much did you pay for this?"
Don't know how I end up blatantly repaying this
With low clouds bury my face in what you race to get
No more now, I won't get lost in all the paper tricks

Because any time i could I tried my motherf*cking best
And you still proved to me you're like the motherf*cking rest
If I given you any less you would've still ended up distressed
Because I didn't bring the stress to you, but I need to confess to you
That I wasn't the best for you, just cut out all the gestures you
Have mentioned, filled with destitute, and sorrow holding next to true
Living in lies, the fenced in truth has kept me in the lessened view
Brings pity to my city, let the shitty feelings get to you
And wander like your father, sits and squanders, and takes plenty too
But rather than the faster things you have earned bringing tension too
You settle for the set and hold a better debt to contribute
I'll never hold a bet that you've embedded in your solitude
And I am too