The Camaraderie - these precious thoughts Lyrics

It's not the little things
That i can not hold on to
It's where we've been before
The blessings and the closed doors
I've lost much more than time
Who was I before you knew?
What things did he regret?
A love and then a lost cause

Just hold that thought, you say
Like it could be so easy
Take your brilliant mind and
Put it in a room with mine

I suppose I could let it go
Just forget about it, done
Make my lack of retention a virtue
I won't hold a grudge on anyone
But I love these precious thoughts
Who are we without the past
Just a chain of present times
Things are looking up but never looking back

And I'm shaking in my sleep again
My eyes they won't stay shut
I bite my tongue, choke on my fears
Just stay calm

Do you remember?
Do you remember? (Did I always forget?)
Do you remember? (Did I always forget?)
Do you remember?

I saw my dad again
But I don't remember
The trouble I've been in
It's taking over me
I don't want to remember
No I don't want to remember
No I don't want to remember

And I'm shaking in my sleep again
My eyes they won't stay shut
I bite my tongue, choke on my fears
Just stay calm
There's a hole where I can't figure out
How you got to me so fast
Holding my hand in a hospital bed
And then you were gone