Am I Diseased?? Video (MV)

I wish these f*cking thoughts would just go away
I'm sick of f*cking feeling so far away
I can't help but think that I'm the one to blame
For this pain, why do I love my misery?
I wish these f*cking thoughts would just go away
I'm sick of f*cking feeling so far away
I can't help but think that I'm the one to blame
For this pain, why do I love my misery?

I'm losing all motivation
It feels like my soul is vacant
I can feel myself slipping away
But yet, I feel so damn complacent
Where the f*ck did I go wrong?
All I do is try to work hard
But the harder I try the more this life
Just f*cking f*cks me raw
And I'm so f*cking tired
Of the way my mind is wired
I just want to feel I'm normal
Without wanting to get higher
Am I preaching to the choir?
The voice in my heads a liar
I'm not alright, I'm not normal
I'm f*cked up and so tired.

Am I diseased?
All this pain I've bottled up inside of me
Sometimes I feel like there's a different side of me
That I hide purposely so you can't see
That I'm diseased.

I wish these f*cking thoughts would just go away
I'm sick of f*cking feeling so far away
I can't help but think that I'm the one to blame
For this pain, why do I love my misery?
I wish these f*cking thoughts would just go away
I'm sick of f*cking feeling so far away
I can't help but think that I'm the one to blame
For this pain, why do I love my misery?

All this stress is building
I can't help but feeling
Like I'm falling apart, with an empty heart
I feel like giving up
To this f*cking anxiety that completely
Takes over me
It's finally outweighed my strength and will
Numbing entirely.
I'm so f*cking close
To breaking down hanging from
The edge of insanity
I'm so f*cking close
To letting depression consume
And take over me
I'm so f*cking close

Slipping on a tight rope
Of my twisted reality
I'm so f*cking close
To giving up everything.

Am I diseased?
All this pain I've bottled up inside of me
Sometimes I feel like there's a different side of me
That I hide purposely so you can't see
That I'm diseased.

I wish these f*cking thoughts would just go away
I'm sick of f*cking feeling so far away
I can't help but think that I'm the one to blame
For this pain, why do I love my misery?
I wish these f*cking thoughts would just go away
I'm sick of f*cking feeling so far away
I can't help but think that I'm the one to blame
For this pain, why do I love my misery?

Am I diseased?
All this pain I've bottled up inside of me
Sometimes I feel like there's a different side of me
That I hide purposely so you can't see
That I'm diseased. Am I diseased?
All this pain I've bottled up inside of me
Sometimes I feel like there's a different side of me
That I hide purposely so you can't see
That I'm diseased.