Why I'm Not Where You Are. Video (MV)

I never meant for it to end this way
With all these ashes in my hands
Yesterday went down in flames so fast
I missed my chance
But understand
I had to give my best
Before I left with
So much left to say
It's best to say goodbye before I can't

We could set fire to these years
I wouldn't have to dream
Let's say a prayer and ask to
Turn these tears to gasoline
Half the things I thought I'd never have
Are here to stay, but
I'm just like my dad
I'd rather burn it down and walk away

I can't hold on
Lost my grip then I
Lost my mind
Hard to find
Where did I go wrong
I'm just fine
I walk this line
All the time

I just drive until I find what
All of this is for
Watch me walk into the waves until
I wash up on the shore
Back in the bathroom on the floor
And I'm throwing up
Knowing that it's hopeless when
I always do the drugs I was supposed to flush
Got a baby girl and she's growing up but
When she's sleeping
Her daddy's dreaming of being rich
When he's still broke as f*ck

By the time you hear this
I'll be gone
Somewhere
Chasing what I was
Dedicated to erasing what I'd done
I know I've made mistakes
But I still wonder if the day will ever come
When the stains'll fade away and I could maybe
Give a f*ck
I caught that case and told you
Basically I'm done
I know you want to help so just
Pray for me
I'm dumb enough to run
Your son forgot the place that he was from
You'd never recognize my face
Because it's full of all the hatred for
The stranger I've become
There's Hate
There's Love
There's Faith
There's guns
There's pain, but it was numb
You can't blame it on the drugs
I couldn't face the shame for giving up
My struggle was in vein
Because I paid for it in blood
In love, the first cut is the deepest
I need the pieces to fit
I'm so sick of keeping these secrets
These secrets keeping me sick
I wish that shit was different
Wishing's never got me very far
So just sit and listen this is
Why I'm not where you are

Hold on
So you don't sail away
Or, let go...
The waves won't say my name at all
So long...
My bones have blown away
They can not feel you
You're safe
I'm not the ghost breathing on your neck
I will lose you

Your smell somehow remains
Those lights, they light your skin
The sound of your echo and
Those eyes...

I'm finished