Horse Bitch - a song about growing up (i guess) Lyrics

Since you started getting tattoos
I haven't known how to approach you
I rode my bicycle right by you
To no avail
Closeted despair
And iron maiden t-shirts
Attentively made sleeveless with a knife
Way back then
You'd sharpen all your pencils
And organize them neatly on your desk
I'm still trying to figure out
What we left without when we did leave
Evidently something I can live without
But if I could get it now
I'm sure it'd help
Flip the record over
And make sure that you're watching
Want you to see so badly the things I know
When we'd stay awake into the early morning
With all of the birds chirping, I hid my smile
I opened up to you
And I'm grateful that I did
No matter how one-sided or short-lived
I'm still trying to figure out
What we left without when we did leave
Evidently something I can live without
But if I could get it now
I'm sure it'd help
Doesn't matter, I'll probably get hit by a car anyway