Kevin Froleiks - Janice Lyrics

On Monday I had the sniffles
On Tuesday Beky felt weak
The next three days went by
People dropped off like flies
And we all knew who spread the disease

Cause each year we get free flu shots
Right here in our big conference room
But one person resists
Won't see the pharmacist
And each year thanks to her we are doomed

So get your f*ckin flu shot
Please do it for all of us, Janice
We go through this each year, I'm sure you remember
You infect the whole office come every December
Get your f*ckin flu shot
Come on, god dammit, Janice
Don't be such a bastard
You walking health hazard
Just get your flu shot today

Now Janice was born in the fifties
And she knows a thing or two
As a kid she would play
In the trash everyday
She's got immunities out the wazoo

But last week Janice was coughing
We all told her go home and get well
But she came into work
ANd now thanks to that jerk
We're all trapped in this fever dream hell

So get your f*ckin flu shot
Please do it for all of us, Janice
We go through this each year, I'm sure you remember
You infect the whole office come every December
Get your f*ckin flu shot
God dammit, Janice
Are you an anti-vaccer?
You think the government tracks ya?
Just get your flu shot today

Well I for one am tired of getting so sick
Year after year
The time has come to take matters into our own hands, the answer is clear
I'm gonna sneak up behind Janice
Gonna give her that flu shot today
Co-workers gather 'round
And help me hold her down
Gonna give her that flu shot today!
What do you mean I can't make her my patient?
What do you mean that's an HR violation?
She does this to spite me
I've asked so politely
How much longer must I live this way?

So get your f*ckin flu shot
Please do it for all of us, Janice
We go through this each year, I'm sure you remember
You infect the whole office come every December
Get your f*ckin flu shot
Come on, god dammit, Janice
Don't be such a bastard
You walking health hazard
Just get your flu shot today
Get your f*ckin flu shot
Please do it for all of us, Janice
We go through this each year, I'm sure you remember
You infect the whole office come every December
Get your f*ckin flu shot
God dammit, Janice
Are you an anti-vaccer?
You think the government tracks ya?
Just get your flu shot today