The MC Type & Pen Pointz - Full Life Crisis (feat. Sage Francis) Lyrics

Life moves pretty fast
Just when you think you're like halfway done
That's when you need to kick it into another f*cking gear
YEAH
Here's some instructions on how to ruin your life
First you should cheat on your wife
Then take the weed in your pipe
Add a little bit of spice by lacing it with coke
Make sure to save some for your nose
And friends that are broke
If you don't have those, well buddy, you soon will
You'll be borrowing money like FDR's new deal
Steal some new wheels, race 'em up hills for thrills
While crushing up pills, snort that stuff up your grill
Act like nothin' will kill ya, nothin's important
Cause nothing on earth's gonna stop this boredom
Pop off at an orgy, stream it cause porn's free
Ride in on a wheel chair yellin' I'm rolling horny
Get as many abortions as you can possibly get
Then chop off you dick and pop on a wig
Rock some fish nets, implant fake tits
Solicit a cop, get 'em in his cuffs and spank him
This ain't mid life crisis, it's full life crisis
I'mma blow more cash than the price is right is
While you blow my hog, I blow up like Isis
Snorting blow so raw it rolls up my eyelids
This ain't mid life crisis, it's full life crisis
I'mma blow my lid n never try to find it
Gettin' blowjobs til I blow loads of my kids
Blowing how I handle shit like the virus
What's in the starter pack that you need to quickly mess up your life
An army jacket and a military wife
Make sure to marry early before either of you are fully formed adults
Only thing better's being born into a cult
Aggravated assault on an officer? Check that
Gang affiliations on full display? Rep that
Experiment with drugs early, before your frontal lobe matures
Then make some babies with some undevoted grrrrls
Spend money, don't save, til you're funds are in utter shambles
Here's the secret on how to recover: GAMBLE
Subscribe to the "Let go and let God" mentality
But also, always self-sabotage...casually
Because everything happens for a reason...they said
You'll succeed if you believe it...they said
All the kids are saying how you're so based
Til your faced with turning 30
And it turns out you're just a basehead
This ain't mid life crisis, it's full life crisis
I'mma blow more cash than the price is right is
While you blow my hog, I blow up like Isis
Snorting blow so raw it rolls up my eyelids
This ain't mid life crisis, it's full life crisis
I'mma blow my lid n never try to find it
Gettin' blowjobs til I blow loads of my kids
Blowing how I handle shit like the virus
Trade in the rogaine for some cocaine
Find a mistress half your age with no brain
Rock a leather jacket, get a nose ring
Start bumpin' Strange Famous like it's your thing
What does it all mean? Did you waste your time
Did you have a purpose? Did you live your life
Do you really give a f*ck what we think of you
Solo dick on a Yolo mish, drink a few.
Show up sloshed to the job interview like a big boy
Demand you only paid in Bitcoin
If the boss seems a bit annoyed and doesn't see your genius
Say, "Wait!" Then explain what an NFT is
And how it's a workaround for the wage garnishment
Cuz child support is theft and you already paid PART of it
You're over the hill so that's one you're willing to die on
Wrong for so long like you've been right all along, well right on
This ain't mid life crisis, it's full life crisis
I'mma blow more cash than the price is right is
While you blow my hog, I blow up like Isis
Snorting blow so raw it rolls up my eyelids
This ain't mid life crisis, it's full life crisis
I'mma blow my lid n never try to find it
Gettin' blowjobs til I blow loads of my kids
Blowing how I handle shit like the virus