Confessional Video (MV)

I'm always saying sorry
Feels like daily for my head space
In quite a few ways
Shit is feeling just like a catchphrase
Keep tossing and turning on top my mattress
Trying to get to sleep
These black sheep are keeping me awake
Cant help but reminisce
Sometimes I dream of death
Battle with that addiction
You can smell it on my breath
Logically I have a good life
I'm still swimming in some debt-
I cant ever hope to repay you
For helping me keep my head
But you stay
And I ain't tripping
Second guessing ain't my place
I know the limits
Eat the food up off my plate
That's forgiveness
I still daydream I could change
And Id prevent this
Laying in this dark room
Fan spinning right
Is this how Bruce felt
Before he dawned a cowl and tights
Did a guilt weigh on his chest
Every time he saw the light
Was he angry at the clock
His biggest nemesis was time
Damn
I think I get it
Staring at the rear view
Don't know just where I'm headed
And when shit gets bad
Feels like I'm the phantom menace
Bout the time that it gets good
Feels like it lasts just a few seconds
I been caught up on the what ifs
And maybe not here for so long
All that trauma from my past
Preventing me from my own end zone
Can blame mom and my dad
I can blame my lack of friends
But in the end, how does it help
If I'm just someone throwing bricks
And I just cant admit
That I been dealt a tough hand
And I just threw a fit
Instead of iterating
A bad situation
I just plead the fifth
Lashed out
Burned out
And crash down
Raining on the lives of others
In their mind I'm axed out
Didn't get any treatment
All my credit cards were maxed out
I didn't bother reading
I'd rather put on a mask how
Became demanding
That you do your best to understand me
I think that I'm a hypocrite
With sugar coated candies
Deprecation ain't honesty
But just a self harm vigilante
Never stopped me from keeping
Catastrophizations handy
Our brain is gray matter
Inside of some steel trappings
I can still imagine the sound of
The faucet water tapping
So now here I stand rapping
I still don't know the cadence
I don't actually know