Noah Kahan - Stick Season Album Lyrics

Air in my lungs
'Til the road begins
As the last of the bugs
Leave their homes again
And I'm splitting the road down the middle
For a minute the world seemed so simple

Feel the rush of my blood
I'm seventeen again
I am not scared of death
I've got dreams again
It's just me and the curve of the valley
And there is meaning on Earth, I am happy

Oh
Oh

Passed Alger Brook Road, I'm over the bridge
A minute from home but I feel so far from it
The death of my dog, the stretch of my skin
It's all washin' over me, I'm angry again
The things that I lost here, the people I knew
They got me surrounded for a mile or two
The car's in reverse, I'm grippin' the wheel
I'm back between villages and everything's still

As you promised me that I was more than all the miles combined
You must have had yourself a change of heart, like halfway through the drive
Because your voice trailed off exactly as you passed my exit sign
Kept on driving straight and left our future to the right
Now I am stuck between my anger and the blame that I can't face
Memories are somethin' even smoking weed does not replace
And I am terrified of weather 'cause I see you when it rains
Doc told me to travel, but there's COVID on the planes

And I love Vermont, but it's the season of the sticks
And I saw your mom, she forgot that I existed
And it's half my fault but I just like to play the victim
I'll drink alcohol 'til my friends come home for Christmas
And I'll dream each night of some version of you
That I might not have but I did not lose
Now you're tire tracks and one pair of shoes
And I'm split in half, but that'll have to do

So I thought that if I piled something good on all my bad
That I could cancel out the darkness I inherited from dad
No, I am no longer funny 'cause I miss the way you laugh
You once called me forever, now you still can't call me back

And I love Vermont, but it's the season of the sticks
And I saw your mom, she forgot that I existed
And it's half my fault but I just like to play the victim
I'll drink alcohol 'til my friends come home for Christmas
And I'll dream each night of some version of you
That I might not have but I did not lose
Now you're tire tracks and one pair of shoes
And I'm split in half, but that'll have to do

Oh, that'll have to do
My other half was you
I hope this pain's just passin' through
But I doubt it

And I love Vermont, but it's the season of the sticks
And I saw your mom, she forgot that I existed
And it's half my fault but I just like to play the victim
I'll drink alcohol 'til my friends come home for Christmas
And I'll dream each night of some version of you
That I might not have but I did not lose
Now you're tire tracks and one pair of shoes
And I'm split in half, but that'll have to do
Have to do

Okay

How have things been? Well, love, now that you mention it
My folks still talk, they speak in these two-words sentences
I'm sayin' too much but you know how it gets out here
No winter coat could keep out all the cold of your atmosphere

We once sang
Retrograde, we'd shake the frame of your car
Now I know your name, but not who you are
It's all okay
There ain't a drop of bad blood, it's all my love

You got all my love while I'm still out here
With the pills and the dogs, if you need me, dear
I'm the same as I was, it's all okay
There ain't a drop of bad blood, it's all my love
You got all my love
You got all my love

Write me a list of how it is, of how it was, of how it has to be
You burrowed in under my skin, what I'd give to have you out for me
I still recall how the leather in your car feels
And at the end of it all, I just hope that your scars healed

We once sang
Retrograde, we'd shake the frame of your car
Now I know your name, but not who you are
It's all okay
There ain't a drop of bad blood, it's all my love

You got all my love while I'm still out here
With the pills and the dogs, if you need me, dear
I'm the same as I was, it's all okay
There ain't a drop of bad blood, it's all my love
You got all my love
You got all my love

Well, I leaned in for a kiss thirty feet from where your parents slept
And I look so confident, babe, I swear, I was scared to death
My hands gripped the wheel, I smiled stupid the whole way home
Well, those five words in my head, you said, "I'll never you let go"

Oh, I sing
Retrograde, we'd shake the frame of your car
Now I know your name, but not who you are
It's all okay
There ain't a drop of bad blood, it's all my love

You got all my love and it's still out here
With the pills and the dogs, wind chill this year
Stole the word from my tongue, it's all okay
There ain't a drop of bad blood, it's all my love
You got all my love

You got all my love
You got all my love
You got all my love
You got all my love

Oh, there was Heaven in your eyes
I was not baptized
Everything's alright when
She calls me back, she calls me back
Lost for a long time
Two parallel lines
Everything's alright when
She calls me back, she calls me back (yeah)

Look at me and don't you lie
I could be your sacrifice
But don't you hold your head up high
For bullshit, I do not have time
I can be an old tattoo
To remind me when I get bad news
That I do not exist to die
But live to die while saving you

Does it bite at your edges?
Do you lie awake restless?
Why am I so obsessive?
Hangin' onto every sentence
This town's the same as you left it
Your page was blank but I read it
I still dial 822-993-167

Oh, there was Heaven in your eyes
I was not baptized
Everything's alright when
She calls me back, she calls me back
Lost for a long time
Two parallel lines
Everything's alright when
She calls me back, she calls me back

I'm runnin' out of tears to cry
They're gone before they hit my cheeks
Maybe it's the air out here
Or maybe something's changin' me
If you think that you could wake me up
Then you don't know how well I sleep
You love me and I don't know why
I only call you once a week

Does it bite at your edges?
Do you lie awake restless?
Why are you so obsessive?
Hangin' onto every sentence
This town's the same as I left it
My page is blank but you read it
You still dial 822-993-167

Oh, there was Heaven in your eyes
I was not baptized
Everything's alright when
She calls me back, she calls me back
Lost for a long time
Two parallel lines
Everything's alright when
She calls me back, she calls me back
When she calls me back

All the pain I should have saved
Oh, I was too afraid of livin' life in your footsteps
In your heart or in your head
Oh, I was too afraid of livin' life in your footsteps
Livin' life in your footsteps
Livin' life in your footsteps
Still she calls me back
Still she calls me

I'm in the business of losin' your interest
And I turn a profit each time that we speak
Don't you know there's a coffin buried under the garden
It was there when we got here, will be there when we leave
And my house was designed to kinda look like its cryin'
The eyes are the windows, the garage is the mouth
So when they mention the sad kid in a sad house on Balch street
You won't have to guess who they're speakin' about

Come over
Come over

I'm in the process of clearin' out cobwebs
I was takin' the wrong meds, feels good to be sad
And my house is just barely big enough for my family
But it feels like a fortress when the weather gets bad
And my mouth was designed for my foot to fit in it
Oh, the words, they went missin' when the stock market crashed
And the Dow Jones keeps falling, but I promise you, darling
With the view in the morning, you won't ever go back

Come over
Come over
Come over
Come over

I know that it ain't much, I know that it ain't cool
Oh, you don't have to tell the other kids at school
My dad'll strike it rich, we'll be the big house on the block
Someday I'm gonna be somebody people want

But I'm in the business of losin' your interest
And I turn a profit each time that we speak
Don't you know there's a coffin buried under the garden
It was there when we got here, will be there when we leave

Ooh, silence is making me nostalgic
Two sizes big you shared in my apartment
Oh, we were kids, but that don't make this less hard
If I could fly I doubt I'd even do it
I'd probably get high and crash or something stupid
You made Ohio feel just like Central Park

Liberal red necks get drunk on a dirt road
Attention deficit kids in their gym clothes
Paper bags drift wherever the wind blows
And mine's full of receipts

Ooh, this town is for the record now
The intersection got a Target
And they're calling it downtown
You and all of your new perspective now
Wish I could shut it in a closet
And drag you back down

Gave me your word and now I can't pronounce it
No thing's so sure that I can't learn to doubt it
Now the state bird, it sings our song so out of key

Liberal red necks get drunk on a dirt road
Attention deficit kids in their gym clothes
Paper bags drift wherever the wind blows
And mine's full of receipts

Ooh, this town is for the record now
The intersection got a Target
And they're calling it downtown
You and all of your new perspective now
Wish I could shut it in a closet
And drag you back down
And drag you back down

Liberal red necks get drunk on a dirt road
Attention deficit kids in their gym clothes
Paper bags drift wherever the wind blows
And mine's full of receipts

Ooh, this town is for the record now
The intersection got a Target
And they're calling it downtown
You and all of your new perspective now
Wish I could shut it in a closet
And drag you back down
And drag you back down
And drag you back down

It's been a long year
Would we survive in a horror movie?
I doubt it, we're too slow-moving
We trust everyone we meet

Two bodies riddled with scars from our preteens
Intertwine in a car's dirty backseat
Stare at a drive-in screen

We didn't know that the sun was collapsing
'Til the seas rose and the buildings came crashing
We cried, "Oh"

Everywhere everything
Wanna love you 'til we're food for the worms to eat
'Til our fingers decompose
Keep my hand in yours

Everywhere everything
Wanna love you 'til we're food for the worms to eat
'Til our fingers decompose
Keep my hand in yours

Drive slowly
I know every route in this county
And maybe that ain't such a bad thing
I'll tell you where not to speed

And it's been a long year
And all of our book's pages dog-eared
We write out the ends on our palms, dear
Then forget to read

We couldn't know that the sun was collapsing
'Til the seas rose and the buildings came crashing
We cried, "Oh"

Everywhere everything
Wanna love you 'til we're food for the worms to eat
'Til our fingers decompose
Keep my hand in yours

Everywhere everything
Wanna love you 'til we're food for the worms to eat
'Til our fingers decompose
Keep my hand in yours

Everywhere everything
Wanna love you 'til we're food for the worms to eat
'Til our fingers decompose
I'll keep my hand in yours

Honey, come over
The party's gone slower
And no one will tempt you
We know you got sober
There's orange juice in the kitchen
Bought for the children
It's yours if you want it
We're just glad you could visit

Feels like I've been
Ready for you to come home
For so long
That I didn't
Think to ask you where you'd gone
Why'd you go?

And you said
Mm, mm
And you said

You said my heart has changed
And my soul has changed
And my heart, and my heart
That my face has changed
And I haven't drank
In six months on the dot

See the graves as you pass through
From a crash back in '02
Not one nick on your finger
You just asked me to hold you
It made you a stranger
And filled you with anger
Now I'm third in the line up
To your Lord and your Savior

Feels like I've been
Ready for you to come home
For so long
That I didn't
Think to ask you where you'd gone
So why'd you go?

And you said
Mm
And you said
Mm

You said my heart has changed
And my soul has changed
And my heart, and my heart
That my life has changed
That this town had changed and you had not
That the world has changed
Don't you find it strange
That you just went ahead and carried on?
And you know I'd say the last time I drank
I was faced down passed out there on your lawn

Are we all just crows to you now?
Are we all just pullin' you down?
You didn't put those bones in the ground
You didn't put those bones in the ground

Honey, come over
The party's gone slower
And no one will tempt you
We know you got sober
There's orange juice in the kitchen
Bought for the children
It's yours if you want it
We're just glad you could visit

Darling, speak to me, but don't you say a word
Light a cigarette, I'll watch it as it burns
Remember telling me that you thought you were cursed
I'm in love with every song you've ever heard

If I could lose you, I would
We buried your bones in plywood
If I could lose you, I would
We buried your bones in plywood

I said love is fast asleep
On a dirt road with your head on my shoulder

Strawberry wine, and all the time we used to have
Those things I miss, but know are never coming back
For you, darling, for you
No thing defines a man like love that makes him soft
And sentimental like a stranger in the park
For a few moments, I see you

If I was empty space and you were a formless shape, we'd fit
But love leaves little runway, and every time we run straight over it
If I was empty space and you were a formless shape, we'd fit
But love leaves little runway, and every time I run straight over it

So I took my medication and I poured my trauma out
On some sad-eyed middle aged man's overpriced new leather couch
And we argued about Jesus, finally found some middle ground
I said "I'm cured"

And I divvied up my anger into thirty separate parts
Keep the bad shit in my liver and the rest around my heart
I'm still angry at my parents for what their parents did to them
But it's a start

But I ignore things, and I move sideways
Until I forget what I felt in the first place
At the end of the day I know there are worse ways
To stay alive
'Cause everyone's growing and everyone's healthy
I'm terrified that I might never have met me
Oh, if my engine works perfect on empty
I guess I'll drive
I guess I'll drive

So I forgot my medication, fell into a manic high
Spent my savings at a Lulu, now I'm suffering in style
Why's pain so damn impatient? Ain't like it's got a place to be
Keeps rushing me

But I ignore things, and I move sideways
Until I forget what I felt in the first place
At the end of the day I know there are worse ways
To stay alive
'Cause everyone's growing and everyone's healthy
I'm terrified that I might never have met me
Oh, if my engine works perfect on empty
I guess I'll drive

And if all my life was wasted
I don't mind, I'll watch it go
Yeah, it's better to die numb
Than feel it all
Oh, if all my time was wasted
I don't mind, I'll watch it go
Yeah, it's better to die numb
Than feel it all

But I ignore things, and I move sideways
Until I forget what I felt in the first place
At the end of the day Lord knows there are worse ways
To stay alive
'Cause everyone's growing and everyone's healthy
I'm terrified that I might never have met me
Oh, if my engine works perfect on empty
I guess I'll drive
I guess I'll drive

I'm sailin' away to a place I'm afraid of
The dawn isn't here, the sun hasn't rose
I'm drinkin' my days with a coastal on Shoreman
They got to make and children back home
The last that I heard you were down in New Orleans
You were workin' your days at The Print
I'll drink 'til I drown and I'll smoke 'til I'm burnin'
Your hands are all over my scent
I worry for you, you worry for me
And it's fine if we know we won't change
I collect every dream in these old empty pockets
In hope that you'll see 'em someday

But the wreckage of you, I no longer reside in
And the bridges of auction's been burned
And the ash of the home that I started the fire in
It starts to return to the Earth
Well, I'm leavin' this town and I'm changin' my address
I know that you'll come if you want
And it's not Halloween but the ghost you're dressed up as
Sure knows how to hunt, yeah, she kows how to hunt

It's an ode to the hole that I found myself stuck in
It's a song the graves that I dug
There's a murder of crows in the low light of Boston
And I see your face in each one
Well, I'm hearin' my life in the tiniest objects
I'm seein' my life on a screen
I'm hearin' your voice in a new foreign language
If only I learned how to speak

But the wreckage of you, I no longer reside in
And the bridges of auction's been burned
And the ash of the home that I started the fire in
It starts to return to the Earth
Well, I'm leavin' this town and I'm changin' my address
I know that you'll come if you want
And it's not Halloween but the ghost you're dressed up as
Sure knows how to hunt, yeah, she kows how to hunt

Two months since you got back
How have you been and are you bored yet?
The weather ain't been bad
If you're into masochistic bullshit

And every photograph
That's taken here is from the summer
Some guy won Olympic gold
Eight years ago, a distance runner
And that makes a lot of sense
This place is such great motivation
For anyone trying to move
The f*ck away from hibernation, yoo-hoo

Well, I'm tired of dirt roads
Named after high school friends' grandfathers
And motherf*ckers here still don't know they caught
The Boston bombers
Time moves so damn slow
I swear I feel my organs failing
I stopped caring 'bout a month ago
Since then, it's been smooth sailing

I would leave if only I could find a reason
I'm mean because I grew up in New England
I got dreams but I can't make myself believe them
Spend the rest of my life with what could have been
And I will die in the house that I grew up in
I'm homesick
I'm homesick
I'm homesick
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh

I would leave if only I could find a reason
I'm mean because I grew up in New England
I got dreams but I can't make myself believe them
Spend the rest of my life with what could have been
And I will die in the house that I grew up in
I'm homesick
I'm homesick
I'm homesick
I'm homesick
Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh

I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say goodbye
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say goodbye

It only falls into place when you're falling to pieces
You find love that lasts a while 'til you lose the reasons
Saying God, I'm alive
But the whole place is quiet
And there's something that you can't place
But you can't deny it
Don't know whether you want a place in the coast or the country
Can't stay here, it's hard to face and it feels too ugly
Light a fire inside yourself, let it burn
Stare up at a starless sky and you say

It's like I'm still here with you
It's like I'm still here with you
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say goodbye

The past coming back with the light in the morning
Look down on myself like a patient in surgery
And I used to watch my mother move
Like God was in the room
It's a bottomless hole I found out here with a trace of no-one
Grab a past box of photos, I rip myself open
I'm in bed and I'm wondering
If I'm callous but hoping
Can I fix what is broken?

It's like I'm still here with you
It's like I'm still here with you
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say goodbye
It's like I'm still here with you
It's like I'm still here with you
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say goodbye

Oh

It's like I'm still here with you
It's like I'm still here with you
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say goodbye
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say goodbye
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say
I don't, I don't, I don't wanna say goodbye

It only falls into place when you're falling to pieces
You find love that lasts a while 'til you lose the reasons
You say God, I'm alive
But the whole place is quiet
And there's something that you can't place
But you can't deny it

Air in my lungs
'Til the road begins
As the last of the bugs
Leave their homes again
And I'm splitting the road down the middle
For a minute the world seemed so simple

Feel the rush of my blood
I'm seventeen again
I am not scared of death
I've got dreams again
It's just me and the curve of the valley
And there is meaning on Earth, I am happy

Oh
Oh

Passed Alger Brook Road, I'm over the bridge
A minute from home but I feel so far from it
The death of my dog, the stretch of my skin
It's all washin' over me, I'm angry again
The things that I lost here, the people I knew
They got me surrounded for a mile or two
The car's in reverse, I'm grippin' the wheel
I'm back between villages and everything's still