The Ravenous - Shades of Fear Lyrics

I'm staring into the eyes of 35 years of experience
I watch him reach for that patient file with haste
He then proceeds to transcribe my emotional state
On the page with an emotionless face
No he don't wanna go overtime
I'm tryna write down these fears but they seem to disappear
The very second that I question if they're bonafide
What's the reason that you're here, what's the trigger
Is it the fear of time flying by, the fear of going through the motions
The fear that this passion is the one true reason that you're here
The reason you can't focus
Wake up in my haze today, feel the warmth of the blood moon
As it reflects the suns rays to me, smell the ash in the atmosphere
Inhale the shade till I catch the fear
The park names changed with fresh coats of paint
The darkness claims but shops open late
See the shift in the coast line, it blows my mind
To know that I was once here where I rode my bike
Pass over the glass of the Westernport
Got me feeling like this bridge ain't half what it was before
Re-examine my ocular, now I remember when I wanted to be popular
I sit and watch as the Eastern Greys, graze on the patch across the road
Knowing very well that time will soon replace
Where they're standing with homes
I feel I've been here for too long
These old thoughts that I have been shading on
Ideas that I lost to this raging storm
And my fears all seem to sing along
Sorry to my ma, that I am not the kid that I once was
I'm just a shadow of myself, take a flight with my demons
Battle with the help while I dabble in the deep feeling shallower than hell
I am still looking round for that version of me
I've lost my I.D. But permanently
So immersed in this search of the person to be
Internal screams turn to the words in the breeze
Why am I so determined to be, such a burden when I dream
Still yearning for me, I'm not like the other one
My brother's got it on, mapped it all out on that lifeboat
While I'm still tryna figure out where I got that rudder wrong
So weak when I try to steer, just so clear that I fear
That I can't even hold a conversation
With my grandmother in my mother tongue
Let alone on to high hopes, no there's nowhere to go when the time's slow
See that light glow even when I'm on flight mode
Re-wrote that line no typo, if you ask me I'll say I'm fine
Stuck on this auto pilot can't change my mind
Had enough and I've thought about it but
It's one of many I can't change this time
So I'll sigh on the in, and look out with a smile
I feel I've been here for too long
These old thoughts that I have been shading on
Ideas that I lost to this raging storm
And my fears all seem to sing along