Eighteen Video (MV)

Started this when I was 16, couldn't even drive
Ended before I turned 18, speed up the time
Starting off, writing was introduced, I could barely rhyme
Now this is something I do every day, all the time
Sorry you can't be here to see how I turn out
All these songs about "you", treat it like a shout out
I have this frustration inside that I want to shout about
So I go and grab my mic and let it all flow out

I wish I could delete my memories like our pics
These feelings inside I'm tired of it
I wish that I could stop thinking that it was perfect
But when you were in my life everything was worth it
But for you anything that I wanted to do started conflict
Maybe it was a sign, I wish I could predict
I know we weren't perfect
But what's the point of getting better if it's always working

Some people want to talk and say it's not a burden
You aren't the person in my shoes and you don't know how I'm hurting
To be honest, I was the only one in this game who was
And now I'm completely different and angry at my life because
You left so it would benefit your own life,
I hope after these songs you know how it affected mine
You never understood me or what I wanted from it
Now a whole year of my life is something I want to forget

I wish I could delete my memories like our pics
These feelings inside I'm tired of it
I wish that I could stop thinking that it was perfect
But when you were in my life everything was worth it
But for you anything that I wanted to do started conflict
Maybe it was a sign, I wish I could predict
I know we weren't perfect
But what's the point of getting better if it's always working

You never believed in me
And never believed this could be something I could do
Now I'm proving it to you
This is something that I do
All you ever did was block me
Now you're blocked out honestly
Why don't you come and talk to me
I heard you were saying I should grow up
I'm just trouble, now shut up
Zip your mouth, I won't show up
You proved that we weren't old enough
Take the time and start growing up
All these words that I'm thinking of
Am I now good enough?

Half the year was wonderful
The next was barely bearable
Your love was so powerful
All these lyrics are parables
My mind was stalking
Sleep gone to walking
Of all the things I've done before
My real life is just starting

I wish I could delete my memories like our pics
These feelings inside I'm tired of it
I wish that I could stop thinking that it was perfect
But when you were in my life everything was worth it
But for you anything that I wanted to do started conflict
Maybe it was a sign, I wish I could predict
I know we weren't perfect
But what's the point of getting better if it's always working

2018 was worse than it seems
What I've seen, maybe you know what I mean
Joke about your pain while your worlds going sideways
I just want to leave it all and hit the highway

All I ever wanted was your heart
Then you grabbed mine, and ripped it apart
All I ever wanted was your love
I can't ever find it, not below or above

Half the year was wonderful
The next was barely bearable
Your love was so powerful
All these lyrics are parables
My mind was stalking
Sleep gone to walking
Of all the things I've done before

My real life is just starting

I wish I could delete my memories like our pics
These feelings inside I'm tired of it
I wish that I could stop thinking that it was perfect
But when you were in my life everything was worth it
But for you anything that I wanted to do started conflict
Maybe it was a sign, I wish I could predict
I know we weren't perfect
But what's the point of getting better if it's always working