RYANN - Gay Struggles Lyrics

I want to live in a town filled with Troy and Olivia fans
Cause I'm afraid to hold my boyfriend's hand when I go on the streets
I don't get too close with my male friends because I'm afraid they might think I have a crush on them
But please don't get me wrong cause in the end I'm grateful that I'm allowed to love a boy
These struggles shouldn't exist all my life
I was trained to kill the person that I was born to be
I don't allow myself to have some fun cause I don't even know what I, what I truly want
And what if someday I decide I want to wear an earring
Do my friends still want to hang out with me?
I don't want to take that risk
I keep on denying who my true self is
I really try to stop caring about what other people think of me
But how can I do that when all I see are couples on the news getting punished for who they really are?
I feel like I'm not allowed to kiss my boyfriend when I am out on the street
But please don't get me wrong cause in the end I'm grateful that I'm allowed to love a boy
These struggles shouldn't exist all my life
I was trained to kill the person that I was born to be
I don't allow myself to have some fun cause I don't even know what I, what I truly want
And I don't want children cause I'm afraid my child will be bullied if he's picked up from school
By two dads
And I don't want to take that risk
So I keep on denying who my true self is