Spose - I'm Awesome Lyrics

[Talking: Spose]
I don't necessarily need to be here for this.
I'll keep the headphones on.

[Chorus:]
Motherf*cker I'm awesome
No you're not dude don't lie
I'm awesome
I'm driving round in my mom's ride
I'm awesome
A quarter of my life gone by
And I met all my friends online
Motherf*cker I'm awesome
I will run away from a brawl
I'm awesome
There's no voice mail nobody called
I'm awesome
I can't afford to buy eight balls
And I talk to myself on my Facebook wall

[Verse 1:]
You know my pants sag low (low)
Even though (though) that went out of style like ten years ago (go)
Spose, I got the swagger of a cripple
I got little biceps getting fatter in the middle
And lyrically I'm not the best
Physically the opposite of Randy Moss and yet so preposterous
Feel the awesomeness the most obnoxious guest up at the sausage fest
Oh yes
The girls are repulsed so I hide in my hood like I'm joining a cult
Uh huh
I'm as nervous as my cattle dirty Curtis
All my writtens are bitten and all my verses are purchased
Me? I'll never date an actress,
Got too many back zits
Plus my whole home aroma is cat piss
Every show I do is poorly promoted and if you like this
It's 'cause my little sister wrote it

[Chorus:]
Motherf*cker I'm awesome
No your not dude don't lie
I'm awesome
I'm driving round in my mom's ride
I'm awesome
A quarter of my life gone by
And I met all my friends online
Motherf*cker I'm awesome
I will run away from a brawl
I'm awesome
There's no voice mail nobody called
I'm awesome
I can't afford to buy eight balls
And I talk to myself on my Facebook wall
I'm awesome

The swagger of a cripple
The swagger of a cripple

[Verse 2:]
Check it out
I'm from Maine and I don't hunt nope and I can't ski
Smoked weed but I can't roll blunts
Might be with my wifey my neck not icy
Eatin' at McDonalds because Subway's pricey
Uh huh and my unibrow is plucked
Just asked my mom if I could borrow ten bucks
Shes like "For what?
Blunt wraps and some Heineken's?
You skinny brick, go get a gym membership and vitamins"
I'm like mom please don't blame it on me
I got my bad habits from you, dad, and Aunt Steve
My attitudes sour but my futon's sweet
And the hair on my ass it is Jumanji
Suit untailored, ringtone Taylor Swift.
Can't tweet up on my Twitter 'cause I haven't done shit
Bank account red, body ungroomed
The good thing about me is I'm off stage soon

[Chorus:]
I'm awesome
No your not dude don't lie
I'm awesome
I'm driving round in my mom's ride
I'm awesome
A quarter of my life gone by
And I met all my friends online
Motherf*cker I'm awesome
I will run away from a brawl
I'm awesome
There's no voice mail nobody called
I'm awesome
I can't afford to buy eight balls
And I talk to myself on my Facebook wall
I'm awesome

[Suit Un-tailored]

[Verse 3:]
Furthermore I'm cornier than ethanol
Cheesier than provolone
I spent years eight to ten living in a motor home
With an ego the size of Tim Duncan
Even though I got shit for brains like a Blumpkin
I'm twenty four serving lobster rolls
Because I spent a decade filling Optimos
And I'm not even the bomb in Maine
On my game and only about as sexy as John McCain

Now put your hands up
If you have nightmares
If you wouldn't man up if there was a fight here
If you got dandruff
If you drink light beer
I'm out of breath

[Chorus:]
But I'm awesome
No you're not dude don't lie
I'm awesome
I'm driving round in my mom's ride
I'm awesome
A quarter of my life gone by
And I met all my friends online
Motherf*cker I'm awesome
I will run away from a brawl
I'm awesome
There's no voice mail nobody called
I'm awesome
I can't afford to buy eight balls
And I talk to myself on my Facebook wall
I'm awesome