Perfectly Nice Lyrics by Original Broadway Cast

MRS. FAIRFAX
It'll be perfectly nice
Having someone with whom to converse
The servants are fine
But a little perverse
And if I'm a tiny bit terse
It's only because I just fired the chef
Are you talking to me?
I'm a little bit deaf
The weather's been rainy and gray
Robert, stop fussing, you're just in the way?
He's really a dear
Though a tiny bit queer
There was a time when winter was here
Milk?

JANE
No

MRS. FAIRFAX
No one came by
No one came near
Sugar?

JANE
No

MRS. FAIRFAX
I was alone, nearly a year
More?
And not a creature would come to the house
The vicar came once but he didn't stay long
Or did he come twice?
Maybe I'm wrong
Then, as the days went along
Like it or not, I was not as depressed
And soon after that
We were finally blessed
With little Adele, darling, come here
This is Miss Eyre
Your governess, dear.

ADELE
Bonjour, Miss Eyre.

JANE
Bonjour, Adele.

ADELE
Oh, vous parlez francais

JANE
She is French, then?

ADELE
Yes, I am French, but I speak English - frighteningly well!

JANE
You certainly do.

MRS. FAIRFAX
Run along now, Adele.

ADELE
Adieu mam'selle.

JANE
Au'voir, Adele...
What a spirited girl

MRS. FAIRFAX
What a story to tell!
Her mother is gone
Gone to the Lord
And Mr. Rochester took her in as his ward

JANE
Mr. Rochester? Who is he?

MRS. FAIRFAX
The owner of Thornfield! Did you not know he was called Rochester?

JANE
I thought Thornfield belonged to you!

MRS. FAIRFAX
Bless you, child, what an idea!
I'm in charge of the hall
When he's away I look after it all
And he's away most of the time

JANE
What sort of man is he like?

MRS. FAIRFAX
The kind of man who is never about.

JANE
Where does he go?

MRS. FAIRFAX
I wouldn't know...
One of a kind
Smart as a sage
And like good wine
Gets better with age
Modest and fair
Yet one wouldn't dare
Behave in a manner unfitting one's class
One has a place
That one mustn't surpass
This is our lot
Like it or not...
I think I've forgotten my thought
What was it? Ah! No, that wasn't it at all
Did I have a point?
I can barely recall
But you'll settle in
Read a few books
You've got the brains, if not quite the looks
You'll soon adjust
Everyone must
Heed my advice
Let's be precise
Listen to me, I will not tell you twice
You will be in good grace if you face
That a girl in your place
Will suffice...

MRS. FAIRFAX AND JANE
...if she's perfectly nice!