Unknown - Number Fifteen Sunscreen Lyrics

Number Fifteen Sunscreen
Jan Harmon

In case of a nuclear attack
Before you evacuate
The EPA has said you will not be dead
If you follow this advice they advocate

( Chorus )
Rub on number 15 sunscreen
Call your mother
Cover up the pool
Get your kids home from school
Wear your sunglasses
Put on clean underwear
Return all library books
And water the plants

Remember your insurance doesn't pay
For nuclear damage to your car
So push it off a cliff or a mountain if
You feel annihilation isn't far

Be sure to leave a forwarding address
For your local post office's file
For in a holocaust all your mail could get lost
And end up in the dead-letter pile

Cancel your American Express
For fear of a nuclear mania
For you may be vaporized on Chicago's South Side
But your card could still end up in Lithuania

Medicare will cover all your costs
If you happen to be over sixty-five
Or if you're on vacation when you die of radiation
You'll be promptly paid, if you're still alive

(Repeat last verse and chorus, omitting last line)