Abel - WITHER Lyrics

I'ma start this shit off heavy
F*ckin' know nobody listens
Out my mind, can't make a living
Got this cheap shit in my system

But it drowns away my demons
Even if it's for a minute
Pay attention, let em listen
If tonight I f*cking end it

Isolate myself from all, wouldn't really recommend it
Then again, I'm all I have
So shit, I co-sign that decision
I mean f*ck, Y'all hate me anyway
At least how I envision

If it's true, I feel the same
Bitch you can suck my f*cking dick
And I've been

Lost for bout a couple years
Stuck inside these walls
It's hard to breathe, I grit my teeth
I hurt so bad, I need to talk

But all my friends are either gone or never see that
I'm in pain Well that's the shit I tell myself,
I know damn well it ain't the same

I ain't the person that I was
And no one told me that I changed
I needed people by my side
But everyone just looked away

So now I'm talking to myself
And I'm staring at the ceiling
Wondering if this even matters
What if life just has no meaning?

What's the point even breathing,
If you know you'll be forgotten?
Put this pistol to my noggin
Maybe that's my only option

Cuz I'm sick of f*cking talking
And if I paint this wall tonight?
Don't even put me in a f*cking coffin
Just let me wither

When I die, f*ck it I wanna go to hell
Cuz I ain't talked to god, and really ain't got shit to tell
And what's to say, to someone I ain't never seen
When he ain't put no other person on this earth that's here for me?

I never lived the life of those I saw on that TV
I swear I raised my f*cking self bc my mom was always sleep
I tried to wake her up, "Mom I gotta go to school, why you always tired?"
Five years old, using methadone bottles for fireflies

And daddy was a bum
At least that's what my momma said
But he was on the search & rescue
Now my pops is dead

And I can't get him back
I don't know how to feel
Never know how to act
But can't really get into that

That ain't the shit that ya'll want, right?
I'm off, right?
This shit won't sell 'less you know that jacket is off-white

I need a couple chains
And a f*ckin gimmick, maybe dye my hair purple so ya'll
F*ckin listen

I could be bitter bout this shit or I could speak my truth
Ya'll stay asking for the music, never ask me how I'm doing
Then you wonder why I never got no shit for you?

Maybe it's cuz I'm sick of singing, politicking and
I need a single person on this earth to get a f*cking clue

What will it take for one of seven billion people just show me that they
Care? Yo let me jump off of this f*cking roof
I take my life tonight, they'll say my smile lights the room
Don't f*cking bother