Dandruff snow keeps fallin' in your food
Uncle's always tipsy
Auntie's extra bitchy
And if your great-grandma's still alive
She's still hella racist too
Cuttin' up a plastic goose again
Mystery potato salad
Sauerkraut on bread
Then Grandpa brings up all his fake news
But
He thinks they're all true
All I want for Christmas is wartime with the fam
It just ain't the same without the fightin
All I want for Christmas is wartime with the fam
They're wild and they're violent, right
Makin' button wreaths out of bottle caps
All the tacky gifts
Stuff that we'd never get
Got some novelties
Some sweet stuff
And great bottle of cough syrup
Little cousins
Runny noses
Pleadin
Demonstrating trinkets
They're the height of summer 'til they're screamin
But if you lose
It brings you higher feelings
Got nothin' to complain to
I wanna perfect Christmas wartime with the fam
It just ain't the same without the fightin
Know I'm gonna miss the war crimes and resolve
All instigations disappointin, yeah
Stop!
Oh oooooh It's that time of year!
Oh oooooh it's time for the Crissy fear!
It's time for the Crissy fear!
Oh oooooh It's that time of year!
Oh oooooh it's time for the Crissy fear!