Allen Wolf - Gretchen / Cellar Door Lyrics

Just when i got my f*cking life back in order shit f*cking me up
She crying saying she let another man in her guts
And what's worse is that i just was feeling good about us
And now i'm on the road about to drive into this truck
Who the f*ck c an i talk to
Shawn down to ride for whatever shit i'm gon do
Even if i wrong you
Constants
How would it be if i was you
Never thought i'd wonder what would Beyoncé do
I can still feel it pick at me like this shit don't belittle me
A little bit of history turning me to cinder
Please, hide from the wolf now
All of this rage
I want that nigga's f*cking number address and his name
I'll pack the knives up
Find a wood chipper to eat his size up
If only it was possible to eat the f*cking lies up
I died some
Even worse i couldn't even cry some
Part of me is sick in the head
I theorize that i'm socio
Is he gemini or a scorpio
No matter how they align
His stars is bound to f*cking blow
I overdosed on keeping my composure around my homies though
So much that i went home and hit anything that was close to throw
My acne came back from the stress killing my good looks
A blind man could place his hand on me and read a good book
I battle with the feeling if i'm attractive enough
I remember you saying i wasn't active enough
And all the demons came back now
I was tryna focus on getting my first million
Now that shit went to the background
I wanna be a killer cuz you f*cked another nigga
I always knew my innocence was temporary filler
Man
How the f*ck could i feel her
Could i f*ck
Could i fill her
Do you think about him or is this shit sincere
I don't know how to deal with all the visions in my head of you in a nigga bed
If i died would you go and move on with him instead
Wait
Silly me
I'm that nigga that these bitches wanna see
It's you or me
The first one to bite is the first one to eat
You played a good game now i want my f*cking feast
Beginning of the end is when i got this f*cking beat
Could give a f*ck less who the f*ck in your sheets with all the fish in the pond
All these other niggas weak
Bitch
Paranoia got me hiding plates from my best friends and seeing them as enemies
I thought some good sleep and good pussy would be the remedy
But that shit wasn't meant for me
I think i found forgiveness in my heart
But there's still steps for me
I still find myself in the mirror unrecognizable
I still find my health really dire and unreliable
I fear when i sleep at night
Motherf*cker if i even get to sleep at night
Muhf*cka if i block out
Black blood in me it never stops now
The pain settles deep in my body
I'm like a rock now
Not a f*cking chain in this world could keep me colder than i already am in this world
Rue the day that i ever f*cking came in this world
There's no solace except for on this track list
Blacklist my dollars
I don't know if you'll recognize me when i'm back bitch
I'm that shit
Live my life backwards
I guess i only go to understand how i've lasted