When the haircut strikes
And you're just not ready
And the barber asks if you can spare a penny
"No no, barber" is what I say
I didn't want a haircut anyway
My mom is making me get one
Even though I'm thirty
She says it looks bad
Because my hair is long and dirty
And I'm ready to move out
But on the other hand I have no money
So he took out the scissors
Started cuttin' away
It was a painful experience
The least to say
"No Mr. Barber, want to keep my mane"
He said I looked like a horse and my hair was gay
So he cut off my hair
And he called me a perv
I'm gonna give that barber
What he really deserves
I'll take out my net
And I'll sail out to sea
And take back the hair
That he took from me