Ayọ - We're lying to ourselves Lyrics

So misguided in my f*cking anguish
Watch as all my options start to vanish
I can see your heart starting to panic
All the answers in the world, we thought we had it
All this hope we're dragging
On the floor, what happened
Hell, I thought we passed it
But we can't outlast it
We're stuck in the past, and
Here we've made our caskets
Brighter being dead, than
In a world of black
The pain is never-ending
Too late to amend it
Are we done pretending?
Can I f*cking end it?
I'm done f*cking hoping
I can't go on choking
But I keep on holding
On a bond that's broken
Should I keep on going?
Killing myself, should I keep on going?
Guess I'll keep on going
In my heart it's snowing
Dying for your warmth
Can we travel back?
Guess I'm never knowing
You're stuck in my head
Distractions can't seem to keep you out
But you want me dead
Looked in your eyes, you're already dead
Looked in my eyes to see if i'm there
Stuck in my mind, I don't like it there
Still alive and I don't like it here
I hold others, there's no one to hold me
People need my happiness, so I'll pretend
Everything is fine, I'll still pretend
I keep others up, it's fine if I'm dead
Thinking of you in the night again
To keep you up, I will meet my end
I've detached so I can heal my soul
If I'm broken, I can't make you whole
I'm just finding the heart to keep going
Who would die for me? I've lived not knowing
I will die before I let you fall
I will die before I let you fall
I'm your pillar, I won't let you fall
I will die before I let you fall