BarJai - My Soul Lyrics

I took roses shredded them on my paper
Lilacs smell better
But they die quicker so their smell won't matter later
Patience
Virtues
Work on patience
Loved ones love or love to hate them
I know God has got a hold on me and I know Satan's getting dangerous
I know I got
Flames upon my blunt aiming at my mind
Taming all the nerves that make the words that's questioning my life
I go to bed and get disturbed inside and sleep deprived
Probably cry forever if I had to put my weed aside
Blame me not at all for myself and for my problems
Slip your feet into my shoes and find there's no soul at the bottom
Tell my dad that if he can croak over and die tonight he really should
God just let me kill him without consequence I wish you would
I just be thinking like who would I could have been
If he didn't partake in the things he did
I wonder am I is this who I am
Never know what it's like to feel innocent
See I have to get high before I get dick
Just cause I can't erase all the images
Think I'm living in spite it is what it is
Cause he ruined my life but he's living his
I cry cause I didn't have no jury
Have no witnesses
I cry cause that shit common
But for me there's still a sicker twist
Crying damn near every night and just because you f*cked me up
Somewhere in my mind I found some talent guess I'm lucking up
Trust me I have every intention
To piss you off when I mention you
Get up under your skin til it eats you up and out in and through
I'm disgusted to come from your nut I hope I'm offending you
You ain't give me shit but hatred bitch and I ain't no kin to you
God said here's a gift and it's called music
And it'd be a sin if you didn't use it
I know that your family got mad abusive
Nobody was there trying to help you through it
I said lord I didn't ask for this
Help me try my best to stay close to you
At least take the pain down a notch
I can't take it
I can't
I just can't
I can't
I'm only 20 and I done been drinking for years
Now tell me that shit ain't a problem
Behind my smile I be screaming so loud
How the f*ck you can't see that I'm bothered
Give me an Oscar
Acting calm collected
When I'm actually temper tantrus
Been neglected
Post traumatic stress disorder if you want a f*cking psychological expression
I'm crumbling
Nice ain't the way I'm gone go out
Depression approaching me close but I'm not about to break down
Hustling
Struggling
Hustling
Struggling
I need a way out my mind
Thoughts in my head need a little direction
My mirror fien for a happy reflection
Who made me strive for my dreams of success
It was me and that's it and I'm still f*cking standing
I can't f*ck with you but you respect me
Cause you know that I'm still gonna demand it
Hand me the crown
I like to shine
I'm the star that beautify the night
Bring my own joy I deserve it and bitch I'm too fine to be crying
Twinkle twinkle little star I'm
About to steal a bit of your light
Clock I'm tired of wasting your time
God I'm walking in your line
Row the boat and hope I don't wreck it
Rough around the diamonds still precious
Trauma shaped the shadow that's behind my potential
I feel so florescent
Twinkle twinkle little star I'm
About to steal a bit of your light
Clock I'm tired of wasting your time
God I'm walking in your line
Row the boat and hope I don't wreck it
Rough around the diamonds still precious
Trauma shaped the shadow that's behind my potential
I feel so florescent