Well a man fell down a pothole
He was looking for a dime
It was full of alligators
He climbed out just in time
He was caught by paparazzi
He sold his story to the press
He even met the Dalai Lama
Another the story of success
Well a lady went to Paris, France
Just to try on some shoes
She stopped a real bank robbery
It was all over the news
Well she fell in love with the French detective
She even bought a wedding dress
Then she ditched him at the altar
Another story of success
And I ran into a gun store
I was hiding from the cops
They had photos posted everywhere
Last seen on Top of The Pops
Wanted all over the country
Had to change my address
Now I'm hanging out with the McBride gang
Another story of success
Everything's a mess"