DNFI - Outlet Lyrics

This self lore that I abhor
Abhorrent concurrent enrollment
In a class of self depreciation
Have a PhD in that shit by now
Didn't realize my mind was fighting itself
Until therapy happened
Was it a tragic interaction
Or an intervention to different thinking

But is it helping

I don't know my own feelings
So how the f*ck should I know
Am I just going through the motions
In hopes of a revelation
Or a normalization
To a familiar current station in life
Striving to find some routine
To keep everything going

And are we moving forward

We're somewhere different and strange
So there must've been motion of some kind
There's no rewind on the tape of life
Within the confusion am I doing something great
Or am I resigned to a fate to fade into obscurity
A surety deep in my brain
It keeps telling me I'm not good enough
And simply wasting my time
Making these rhymes for a nonexistent audience
Prominently repeated through my mind
Am I defined by my ability to garner attention
To maintain retention of continued interest
Or are these thoughts an attempt at abstention
To try and avoid a potentially fictitious rejection

I hope it's the last one

What is this hope but false pretense
Unrelenting in its attempts to comfort
While distorting realistic outlooks
And crushing your dreams every time
But what a rush right
Having everything crumble down around you
Like a cracked foundation
Failing to shelter you from the coming storm
Is that what's becoming our norm

It doesn't have to be

Hah
You think your planning will see us through
Fanning the flames to something better and new
Who do you think you are our therapist
Insisting on trying to defy
Ever intensifying feelings of lacking fruition
Creating more friction in our emotions
If that's your definition of progress
I'd rather regress some more
Into that childish temperament
Of irresponsible fun that some of us are so fond of

You can think what you want
But I want to forge something to feed us
Through this outlet of creative expression
Keeping us sustained and sane
During this refrain of mental clarity
And scarcity of feeling stability security and safety
I know I need this
And I think we need this