Eminem - Get U Mad Lyrics

[Intro:]
Yo!... yo! [Eminem hachs up spit]
Mic check... (My dick!)
Testing... one, two [Eminem hach-spits on mic]
Ffff-f*ck... (My dick!) My nuts...

[Verse 1:]
My attitude is worse than NWA's was
I'll battle you over stupid shit
And diss people who ain't have shit to do with it,
Like Cool J does (My tattoo!)
You see me standin' outside of your buildin; screamin',
"Puffy is good, (HEY!) but Slim Shady is for the children! " (WAIT!)
I look at my life in a new light - F*ck it!
Give me two mics; I write songs for me - f*ck what you like
You're probably hear me rap half-hearted;
Cause I don't like rap anyway, I'm just tryin' to get my porno career started
Every place and event... +Been There, Done That+
Shit... Dre stuck me in a suitcase when he went [zipper] (C'mon, let's go!)
Want a deal? Study these 5 chapters
Lesson 1: Throw demos as hard as you can at signed rappers
Lesson 2: Face 'em and diss 'em (whattup dog?)
Don't give 'em a demo; kidnap 'em {I want U to come with me} and make 'em come to your basement & listen
(You're gonna f*ckin' check this out!) Lesson 3: Get a job at a label;
Switch demos with Cannibus and put yours on the owner's table (here listen!)
Lesson 4: "Know you heard this before'."
"Hey let me get your number; I'll call you tomorrow, for sure! "
Don't act like a fan,
You wanna get signed?
Get the Withest A&R aou can find, pull him aside
And rap as wack as aou can
Lesson 5: Get a hook-up at Jive
Dress up like I.C.P. and have them come see you perform live
And that's the key, but when U see me on the street;
I ain't givin' you shit bitch; don't even bother askin' me
(Get away from me!) Toilet water splashes me right in the ass when I'm spittin'
Cause I'm always shittin' when I'm rappin' like Master P (UNNNGGGGH!)
Got a blow-job from Paula Jones, and stuffed it so far in her mouth
My balls broke both of her collarbones (OWW!)
Told Mya this shit was all about me-ah ("It's all about me... ")
Gave Alyssa Milano syphillis, mono and gonorrhea ("You're a dick! ")
And all three of my main girls said SEE-YA
Cause Brandy and Monica walked in and caught me f*ckin' Aaliyah
(What? Oh my God!) I splish splash while I'm takin' a bath
Grab a handful of pills, break 'em in half, take 'em and laugh
White trash - f*ckin' your wife in the ass! ("Oh! Ooh Shady! Oooh! ")
While you're out siphoning gas for your lawnmower to cut the grass [fart]

[Chorus:]
So if I hurt your self-esteem and you get dissed too bad (Yo why you diss me?)
You know I just be sayin' that to Get U Mad.
And when I rap about a buncha shit you wished you had (A big dick!)
You know I just be sayin' that to Get U Mad.
½I can't listen to that song, that shit's too said! ½
You know I just be sayin' that to Get U Mad.
½He'll never make it, his wrist is slit too bad! ½ (Nurse! Nurse!)
You know I just be sayin' that to Get U Mad...

[Verse 2:]
What a wonderful day; [whistling] I should go outside and play
Ain't no need to sit inside the house and hibernate.
Hi Renee! (Oh hi!) I was just about to toss a live grenade
In your driveway (WHAT?) and drive away. [car peels out]
Are you afraid of a blade made of a razor with AIDS
Blood drippin' from it, rippin' your stomach like a paper mache. (AAUUUUUH!)
You talk a lotta shit, but you was never I'll though
I'm sick enough to beat you to death with a feather pillow.
Tipped over some cows, just for a joke and a laugh (MOOOOO!)
Jumped up, choked a giraffe, snapped his neck and broke it in half.
Wagin' wars, went on stage and sprayed Cage with "Agent Orange"
And wiped my ass with his page in Source. (here!)
The demon is here, steamin' this year
I rip {Mystikal's} voicebox out. Scream in his ear. (AAAAAAAAAAHHHH!)
It's not a gimmick bitch, it's an image I live it
Give a f*ck? - I don't know what a f*ck is to give it.
"Yeah I don't think this guy is well... " I'm high as hell
I'll beat you with a live cat when I'm swinging him by his tail.
½I'll f*ckin'!
I'll f*ckin'!
Lay your nuts on the dresser
Just your nutsack by itself
And bang them shits with a spiked bat
Cut your neck off and sew your head right back - and leave you like that½
You just triggered the prick who just mixed liquor
Who's itchin' to leave you disfigured and stiffer than Chris-topher
Reeves - I was teething with strep throat, while your mother was breastfeeding
And gave her the flesh-eating disease.
I'm iller than takin' a hammer and beatin' your knees
And walkin' through South Central L.A., bleedin' in jeans.
(Am I a Blood or a Crip?) Wakin' up the next day in breathin' machines
Flashin' back to being shot and repeatin' the scenes.
On how you just got smoked,
And if you do live,
You'll be too scared to tell it,
Like a Biggie and 'Pac joke.

[Chorus: x2]
So if I hurt your self-esteem and you get dissed too bad
You know I just be sayin' that to Get U Mad.
And when I rap about a fat bitch that you wished you had
You know I just be sayin' that to Get U Mad.
"I can't listen to that song, that shit's too said"
You know I just be sayin' that to Get U Mad.
"He'll never make it, his wrist is slit too bad"
You know I just be sayin' that to Get U Maaad...

[Outro 1:]
I know that makes you real mad, don't it? (uh-huh!)
That's right! Slim Shady (yup!) Sway & Tech
Sprayin' wreck... bitch!
And we don't give a heck (uh-uh!)
Or a damn... or a f*ck... or a shit
So suck my motherf*ckin' dick

[Outro 2:]
Wake up Charene, tell me how I mean!
Mean hard beats... hard rhymes... B-Boys!
Hip-Hop baby!