2017
The first time you messaged me
First fan I ever had
Put me on when you were sad
Said you hated growin' up
You were sure that I'd blow up
Shared my song with all your friends
I could barely pay the rent
Singin' to an empty room
But I knew what it meant to you
You got the X's tattooed
Remindin' me I have you
Never got to thank you
I wouldn't be here without you, without you
Without you believin'
And now that I'm here without you, without you
The words have no meanin'
A promise was spoken, you're gone and I'm broken
Now I'm barely holdin' on, holdin' on
I wouldn't be here without you
Why am I here without you?
2021
Told me that you've come undone
Lost your job and lost your dad
Your biggest fan, he's all you had
X's covered up with scars
On your arm from self-harm
Message me, I don't reply
I wish I knew it was goodbye
Singin' to a crowded room
Saved a seat, I look for you
I made it to your hometown
Guess I'm on my own now
I wish I got to save you
I wouldn't be here without you, without you
Without you believin'
And now that I'm here without you, without you
The words have no meanin'
A promise was spoken, you're gone and I'm broken
Now I'm barely holdin' on, holdin' on
I wouldn't be here without you
Why am I here without you?
(I wouldn't be here without you, without you)
(I wouldn't be here without you)
This is dedicated
If you put me on your playlist
If you showed up to the stages
If I never get to say this
I'm proud of you
For all the shit that's drownin' you
And all the noise surroundin' you
Hope you find what I found in you
And I hope that you grow old with me
And we turn up 'til we're seventy
Play me at your wedding and you never leave
If you ever need anything and I don't pick up
Well, you still got a friend in me
Wish I said all that to Heather
Now I just hope she rests in peace