Half Waif - Fog Winter Balsam Jade Lyrics

I will not despair this time of year,
When all the lights are shining
And the bells are ringing high and clear.
Oh you can't say I'm not trying.

And I go out in the afternoon,
And I'm burying a secret
That grew inside me like a moon
Til I could no longer keep it.

You might say something's missing.
You were mist in morning light.
How could I have missed this?
I want you by my side.

And nobody made me promises,
No one offered me protection.
And still I thought in my green heart
That I could be the exception.

You might say something's missing.
You were mist in morning light.
How could I have missed this?
I want you by my side.
Watching the sun set at 4pm,
Holding the shape of another hand.
You might say something's missing.

So I put my hands into the earth
And I thank you. You were my first.
You made me a mother.
You made me a mother.

And now every July will never feel the same
Or cutting an apple
Or hearing your name
Or watching the heron take flight in the rain.
Or fog or winter or balsam or jade.
Fog. Winter. Balsam. Jade.