("I really was born at 9:29 am on nine twenty-nine)
(You think I'm lying but I'm being dead serious")
("I need to see this birth certificate")
("Okay, I'll prove it")
Well who am I? I'm almost 25
Can't remember half the time that I've been alive
'Cause half was in a cheap apartment
And half was on the Eastside
They said don't, "Don't meet your heroes
They're all f*cking weirdos"
And God knows that they were right
Because nobody loves you, they just try to f*ck you
Then put you a feature on the B-side
And who do you call when it's late at night?
When the headlines just don't paint the picture right
When you look at yourself on a screen and say
"Oh my God, there's no way that's me"
And I, I quit smoking, well recently I tried
And I bought another house and I never go outside
And I remember this girl with pink hair in Detroit
What she told me
She said, "Ashley you gotta promise us that you won't die
'Cause we need you" and honestly I think that she lied
And I remember the names of every single kid I've met
But I forget half the people who I've gotten in bed
And I've stared at the sky in Milwaukee
And hoped that my father would finally call me
And it's just these things that I'm thinking for hours
And I'm picking my hair out in clumps in the shower
I lost the love of my life to an ivory powder
But then I realize that I'm no higher power
That I wasn't in love then and I'm still not now
And I'm so happy I figured that out
I've got a long way to go until self-preservation
Think my moral compass is on a vacation
And I can't believe I still feed my f*cking temptation
And I'm still looking for my salvation
Soft and slow, watch the minutes go
Count out loud so we know you don't keep 'em for yourself
Watch the minutes go
Count out loud so we know you don't keep 'em for yourself
"I think I have a confession to make (so we know you don't)
I have to say I was really born at 9:26, it's on my birth certificate
I'm a liar, I'm a f*cking liar"
Soft and slow, watch the minutes go
Count out loud so we know you don't keep 'em for yourself