You know the call came in on a princess phone on the patio
She said "Hey, if that's Geppetto
Tell that puppeteer that I ain't here yet
Tell him that I ain't done with my beers yet
Tell him that I'm up in Massachusetts
And if he wants to buy me some I'll be in the kitchenette
Making meals out of marzipan
Making love with the black and tans
Crushing butts in a coffee can"
When the crowd went wild
We were under the stands
Mouths and hands, baby
Hands and mouths
So many shows where nobody comes out
Where were you when the call came in?
I was on a rocky mountain freedom binge
With all the living members of the cityscape skins
You and me and Gideon
Holly went to Hollywood
It looked nothing like she thought it would
She didn't get to the part with the studios
She went straight to video
She did a movie called "North Dallas Foursome"
There was agony and ecstasy and the cheerleaders got gruesome
She did a movie called "Revenge of the Pervs"
Yeah, there were screams, and jeans, and curves, and nerves
Charlemagne in a shallow grave
With a Nazareth tape
And a vodka ice and Gatorade
He didn't really fit the plan she made
These hoodrat chicks they're like razor blades
They're pretty cheap but they'll cut you deep