Jason K. Thompson - Normal Guy Lyrics

I refill my plastic soda bottles with purified water, and I call it "Crystal Pibb"
You better believe if I pay a dollar-fifty for a soda I'm gonna get my money's worth
I don't like coffee, but I drink it every morning
'Cause if I don't I'm gonna murder one of my kids
I need that caffeine boost to get me going
Or else all I'm gonna do is curse the day of my birth

'Cause I'm a normal guy, just a very normal guy
I like watching "Wheel of Fortune" and "Jeopardy!"
I'm a normal guy, just a very normal guy, yeah
At least I seem normal to me

I go to church every single Sunday
And throughout the week I try to read the Book
And when that woman jogs past my car window
I try really hard not to give her that second look

I'm a normal guy, just a very normal guy
I like watching "Frasier" on TV
I'm a normal guy, just a very normal guy, yeah
At least I seem normal to me

I don't really care about Mitch McConnell
Or Pelosi, Trump, Rand Paul or AOC
As long as they let me work and get my paycheck
And don't take too much taxes, that's fine with me

'Cause I'm a normal guy, just a very normal guy
Raising my three kids in obscurity
I'm a normal guy, just your average joe normal guy, yeah
At least I seem normal to me

I'm a normal guy, just a very normal guy (I'm normal)
And I like watching Cowboys football on TV
I'm a normal guy, just a very normal guy, yeah.
At least I seem normal to me