Josiah Davis - Perfect Burden Lyrics

Does Novocaine work on the heart?
I need to numb this pain
How do I know if it ended
When I don't know where it started?
I guess it ended long ago
But you still sticking in my brain
This love is steady
Bringing me down, heavy
I just don't know what to do
I try to think of other girls
Focus on more important things
And I just can't stop thinking of you

This plague
This burden
Perfect, worth it, burden
I wish you'd just get outta my head
'Cause this pain
This hurtin'
All the perfect hurt, it's
Way too much to handle, but I'd do it all again
This perfect burden, perfect
This perfect burden, perfect

Do people know what hurts them the most?
I'm sure they would if it'd happened to them
You know, I try moving on
But I keep writing these songs
Hoping that one will help you realize: I'm him
This love is terrible
I'm getting unrepairable
I need to get my mind off this quick
But every time that I convince myself
That this ain't gonna happen
You smile and make me want you again

Yeah
This plague
This burden
Perfect, worth it, burden
I wish you'd just get outta my head
'Cause this pain
This hurtin'
All the perfect hurt, it's
Way too much to handle, but I'd do it all again
This perfect burden, perfect
This perfect burden, perfect

You know me
Better than I know myself
But now I see
This is affecting my mental health
I'm going crazy
Been crazy for a while, but now it's raging
I'm hazy
I'm facing
The fact that it's just better if you hate me

I think it's just better if you hate me
If you never, ever talk to me again
If you just let me navigate my life without you in it
I think that would be better for me as a whole
Cause... it's just... I can't get anything done with you in my life
Seriously

I got a little off topic
Lemme hop back on this
I gotta give you a piece of my logic
I've been faking being okay with where we're at
I've been lately feeling so pained by all this trash
I keep getting myself into
I know that you not into me
Gotta get that into my thick skull
And though I'm into you
I get that I'm intolerant of your position on me
I guess I'm in too deep
But I respect you though
And I gotta let you go
And I'm not looking forward to that
I'm holding on to a crush I've had since 13
I'm holding since Identity 2014
And it's not easy saying bye to that
I've really vibed with the fact
That you like when I rap
And when you ride in the passenger seat of my car
I don't wanna take you back, I wanna drive so far
But I know you wouldn't like that
You gotta be home
And the ride back to my pad
Feels so alone
I don't know if I'll ever find someone new like you
I love you, T
I hope you know
I always hoped you knew