Just Dandy - Losing Time Lyrics

Everyday I lose more time to fear and panic that rises so quick
So it's time for me to pack up and head for more familiar grasses
To ensure this mindless joke that passes for an existence
In 60 months a quarter day still felt okay
Then pounding like a nail right through my skull comes all my memory
In just 5 years half the day is spent in blissful ignorance
With half a day of darkness, hope, gloom, beauty, and memories

And now I'm here with just fifteen minutes of sadness and fear
And a day spent in a haze of nauseating deja vu
And fractured nights spent trying to remember you
Five years spent in a fog of denial distilled in bottles, capsules, and smoke
Trying to hide from the monster, that ugly beast made of memory
But now I'd cry if I saw it rushing round the corner, shambling towards me
Not out of guilt or fear
No, it's more the fact that I am losing myself
I'll take my feelings off the the shelf
Embrace that shambling beast who holds my pain, who will inspire my last refrain
I've lived over a life and a half
No wonder my head is forgetting this sick monotonous life I'm somehow living
While unable to truly live, and still f*cking incapable of dying

When I don't remember I'm less alone
But when that memory revolver empties its chamber I will bite the goddamn barrel
But I'll remember for that one second back when I met you
With just one second to remember you
It makes me see the wreck I've turned into
And it's scary, depressing, boring, indescribable, crazy, and yeah
It murders those five years spent trying to forget you