[Speaking:] Alright baby girl, let's sing to it
+
[Pre-Verse:]
+
You're getting your degree, you're going to college
+
I'm making music and hoping that kanye puts me on
+
But If I don't make it baby, will you be mad at me
+
If I just chilled at home as your stay-home-daddy?
+
[Verse 1:]
+
Come on, Ill make you coffee (coffee), and a bagel (bagel)
+
And another bagel (2 bagels)
+
Keep on reading that paper, then it's off you go
+
Hun your gonna be late, don't forget your briefcase, drive safe, (peace babe)
+
Wake up the kids, toast the toast, put the raisin bran up in the bowl
+
The toast... did I forget the toast? The toast is toast, damnit I burnt the toast
+
Start crying, the kid's like Dad what's wrong? Oh it's not you kids...
+
It's just me I'm alone... Dad's a little bit stressed... Oh F*CK!
+
Feeling so sensitive, I'm going for a latte, see what's popping at pilates
+
Hit up my friends like yo what up man, you trying to have a spa date?
+
The f*ck? Your a stay at home dad... that's not gay!
+
[Hook:]
+
Ay, ay, ay, ay, you go to work, I mow the lawn
+
Ay, ay, ay, ay, you make the cheese Ill bring the guac (Nacho Sauce, Spanish)
+
Ay, ay, ay, ay, you buy the clothes, I'll take them off [...]
+
Ay, ay, ay, ay, I'm a stay at home dad, this is my job
+
[Pre-Verse 2:]
+
You go girl, get that promotion
+
I'll be on the sofa, collecting unemployment
+
Yelling at the tv, watching Maury Povich
+
Quit groping that girl, Maury Povich
+
[Verse 2:]
+
Who is this Shelly Jones bitch?
+
Shit it's 4 o' clock time for Oprah (Oprah)
+
The gospel of the Lord, for dads who stay at home
+
Even though we can't get boners
+
But still Ill trade that for your lane cooking lasagna
+
Swoopin up the kids from soccer practice (soccer practice)
+
Then time for gymnastics, rice crispy treats and wax baggies
+
I'm with my kids in the mini-van, listening to NPR
+
With the windows down, through the cul de sac
+
Then it's homework time, dinner time, set the placemats
+
Cut clean, tuck the rugrats in blankets
+
Then I lay you down, pop two cialis, put on stain and
+
Then go quench my palette
+
Is that douche, or does your cooch just smell like flowers?
+
Your feet are calloused, peppermint towlette
+
Jasmine pedicure? Scented oil, homeopathic backrub?
+
I am Aladin, your carpet is magic, your wish has been granted
+
I would just love to ride your carpet out of the palace
+
Now keep on bringing the green baby, and Ill keep on tossin' salad
+
[Hook:]
+
Ay, ay, ay, ay, you go to work, I mow the lawn
+
Ay, ay, ay, ay, you make the cheese Ill bring the guac (Nacho Sauce, Spanish)
+
Ay, ay, ay, ay, you buy the clothes, I'll take them off [?]
+
Ay, ay, ay, ay, I'm a stay at home dad, this is my job
+
[End speaking:]
+
Ladies and gentlemen, we have been, conditioned to believe
+
We must fit in a role? brainwashed by babylon
+
Depicting our role must match our genitalia, hell to the no
+
It's men who go to work, and women raise the children, but I know
+
The hardest job is maintaining the household
+
So I am doing a back to back, no tradebacks, with this briefcase
+
For 2010, I am staying at home
+
