Mad.S - I'm Sorry Lyrics

Hi dad

Okay, this is going to be hard
I have some things I wanted to say, from deep down
But first: let me clear off, this ain't gon' be like last time
I was stupid, and I'm sorry, but it's in the past right?
Second: I don't know if my emotions are clear
Cause I f*cking hate rapping, but trust me, I'm sincere
So I hope that it'll show when I record this song
Cause I really want you to know, what I said, was wrong
Third: writing this is a f*cking struggle
I suck at writing normal lyrics, so this is double trouble
And on top of that, I can't seem to put my head to rest
On this topic, but I'll be damned if I don't try my best
Okay, dad, I'm sorry, I know
I sided with the others and not the guy who was alone
I mean you had the girls, but still, it was no fun
Seeing your family make you hated, by your own son
And I admit it, I never ask to hear your side
That's my biggest regret in life, cause f*ck, all this time
That I've spent thinking that you, were the bad guy
All I had to do was ask, but no, I didn't try
Cause I, was too scared to hear the reply
Thinking that if you lost me, you'd probably rather die
F*cking selfish idiot, that's me, no pride
But that's in the past now, and there's no reason to cry
Cause now I realize, that there's only one side
It's by the one who shows me love, and so should I
I might, not have the answers, but I'm, not gonna hide
I've been doing that for years, f*cking more than 5
And as I wrote this, you called to say hi
You had some information, and it wasn't quite right
The doctors told you, that you might have blood cancer
I didn't know what to ask, cause you didn't have the answers
So f*ck, maybe it will be goodbye soon
But if I lose, my dad, it'll be in a high mood
I'll write you, and call, if you're lost, I'll find you
Cause you're my dad, so it's not something that I choose
I've been an awful son, I know now
I was scared of you, because of my own doubt
You've always protected me, supported, guided and taught me
But most importantly, unconditionally, you've loved me
And f*ck, I've spent so many years thinking you were wrong
But there's no right and wrong, only a stupid son
So I'm sorry... sorry I didn't ask
And I'm sorry that I didn't show you respect, dad
This song feels weak, like I didn't succeed
At saying what's been on my mind, for f*cking weeks
But breathe... I think I got it out
Now all there's left to do, is make my dad proud

I'm sorry...