The Mercer - White Guys Lyrics

White Guys

I got street cred, okay not really
But I beef feds, okay not really
But on weekends, I smoke upwards of twenty five native cigarettes and that shit's harsh, man
I'm a gansta, me and twenty of my dawgs got a hanger, that we all meet up in with anger
We rebel against the system, and grow massive tomato plants and farm chickens
Fed with animal byproduct, and pumped full antibiotics
Genetically modified to be larger than a fully grown tiger from Africa
Sell the meat to A&W and laugh because
They don't know that their food's still poison
All the parents will feed it to their boys and girls, thinkin' they're makin' a healthy decision
With a name like chubby chicken, obesity's the mission
We're the kinda guys, that don't realize that our flies are down
We wear New York hats, but we're from Canada
We think #SWAG is a lifestyle
We haven't seen a pussy in quite a while
My friend's girlfriend's friend used to f*ck a guy
Who used to live in an apartment that was right beside
An old building that used to be a studio
That somebody told Jay-Z that he should go to
He never went, cuz honestly the place was lame
That's why they ended up closing in the first place
But still, a famous guy was almost close to it
Which was close to them, who were close to me
I can't believe that I'm so closely linked to super stars
The only difference is my bicycle is not a car
My gold chain is really just plastic
But my rhymes are f*cking fantastic

White guys are taking over hip hop
And turning it to mainstream shit pop
We started out of boredom, now we can't stop
Cuz our contract necessitates a yearly album drop
We're broke as f*ck, so let's be honest
Oh please, go waste your money on us
If you buy an album, that's a bonus
Hopefully our families won't decide to disown us
I'm sorry mom, I disappointed you
I did exactly what you always told me not to do
You told me I'm a fool, and that I wasn't cool
Should have listened when you told me that I should have gone to school, yeah
I never knew what fractions could have done
I'm stuck in 4/4 and I wanna switch it up
But I dropped out young, everybody says I'm dumb
But I was born a white guy, so bitch just tell me, how come? Yeah

We're white guys, with blonde hair and blue eyes
Desperately seeking approval, hope my Wikipedia page don't get removed, no
Just a couple wise guys, with long hair and red eyes
Desperately seeking approval, hope my Wikipedia page don't get removed, no

I'm a genius, okay not really
I'm from Venus, okay not really
But my penis, is adequately larger than almost all the guys my girlfriend's ever been with
And i'm a dealer, got a hand for playing cards
Got a trick or two up my sleeve, it's time to raise the bar
So if you see some bar floatin', don't be alarmed now
It's just an excuse for me to get my anaconda charmed
There's no harm in getting lucky on the down-low
I keep it secret that Casino's are my second home
I play 'em over and over again, they don't get old
The third album is my favorite from Blue Rodeo
I drink spiced rum straight from the bottle
The Coca-Cola makes it easier to swallow
I get absolutely plastered after three shots
Then I run around screamin' like a retard
I've spent countless hours navigatin' dungeons
Usin' nothin' but a compass and a map to run shit
And if you think that I should get down off my high horse
You can suck my dick, I got the f*ckin' Triforce
I'm a legend, I'm linked to the past
I'm makin' history, and my legacy will last
I'm swimmin' in a pool of cold hard cash
Aquired donkeys, you know I always get dat ass
So now you see, I'm everything you wanna be
I'm a straight up low-life wannabe
I'm always puttin' quantity over quality
I used cliched stereotypes for novelty
Everybody ought to see, eventually
That I'm lacking in mental health well-being
But why fix what's broken, when it works for me?
Rhymes are easier to write when you're completely crazy, yeah

White guys are taking over hip hop
And turning it to mainstream shit pop
We started out of boredom, now we can't stop
Cuz our contract necessitates a yearly album drop
We're broke as f*ck, so let's be honest
Oh please, go waste your money on us
If you buy an album, that's a bonus
Hopefully our families won't decide to disown us
I'm sorry mom, I disappointed you
I did exactly what you always told me not to do
You told me I'm a fool, and that I wasn't cool
Should have listened when you told me that I should have gone to school, yeah
I never knew what fractions could have done
I'm stuck in 4/4 and I wanna switch it up
But I dropped out young, everybody says I'm dumb
But I was born a white guy, so bitch just tell me, how come? Yeah

We're white guys, with blonde hair and blue eyes
Desperately seeking approval, hope my Wikipedia page don't get removed, no
Just a couple wise guys, with long hair and red eyes
Desperately seeking approval, hope my Wikipedia page don't get removed, no