Michael Garrett Rice - Rub N Tug Lyrics

I woke up, I got some stiffness, gotta get with the lil' asian missus
Off to the place decorated with dragons and fishes,
I want some tuggin' on the thang where the piss is coming from
Rubbin', and maybe some lovin', alleviate my soreness and horniness all in one swing
Ring ring, I call up ling ling
I want the Chinese finger trap on my dingaling
Yeah, you know what I mean, what you think foo?
Bump it
Won't you rub and tug my weenie
I'm walkin' in and gettin' naked, layin' with a white cloth coverin' my back end, rub me down, love me downstairs
I even shaved off all of my ball hairs,
For a special occasion, with a lovely lil' asian lady
Gonna get crazy,
My muscles may be tight, but my shorts are even tighter
Plannin' on makin' the sheet even whiter
You know what I mean, yeah
Won't you rub and tug my weenie
Play it
Yeah, alright, check it
So now I got a big pee-pee, makin' a tee-pee outta the sheets and
She sees, says it's not a crime, it happens all the time
For a few extra dimes, she love me long time
Hit the gong, and spit on the ding-dong
Head in the direction of the erection, and wank my willy
Wonka, please keep out of the chocolate factory
Cause I ain't up to snuff, about all of that butt stuff
Yeah
Uh-huh, uh-huh
Won't you rub and tug my weenie
Get it
Uh-huh, uh-huh
It was a moment I would savor, until she asked me to return the favor
You scratch my back, and I'll scratch yours
Sure, but its a little different when her schlong hit the floor
Turns out little Miss She was a he
And she got that big D
I said, well, that's a little awkward
I suppose I should thank you for rubbin' my cock, sir
I don't wanna be rude
But how was I supposed to know that she was a dude
Well, I don't wanna get canceled for being transphobic
So you know I had to take a hold of her dick with some spit
And I shook that shit
And when she came, she started to sang like this