Orakles - Disappointment Lyrics

Tired of feeling low
Everyday I wake up
Yo
What have I become
I'll do anything to feel numb
I'm sorry for the disappointment i'v become
Momma
I love you and i'm sorry for pissing you off
But please stop getting pissed over the simplest of shit
All the reasons that I was depressed was a lie
Wasn't cause the pimples
Wasn't case the bullies
Wasn't cause my size
I just couldn't take my f*cking life
If we didn't get to say our final goodbyes
Would you even mind
Would you even bat an eye
Would you even cry
Would you get the butterfly's
Or would you sigh knowing i'm out your life
It was destiny to go on that green light
And let that semi-truck slam right into our side
Chances are you would have survived
Me on the otherhand
I would have died but no need to cry
Friends texting
I barley reply
I'm losing my thought of mind
While i'm on this grind
I wish I could rewind the past
To when we used to laugh
But that's far past
I can't understand what happened
It like we hit a wall and crashed
Everyone stays strapped
Like we're at combat
Ready to snap
Why is everyone so mad
When we can't talk
I talk to my notepad
I don't want the family we have
I want the family we had

Tired of feeling worthless
Everyday I wake up
Yo
What have I become
I'll do anything to feel numb
I'm sorry for the disappointment i'v become
Dad
I hate you and never wanna see you again
All the promises you'd break
Have given me a heartache
I knew you were fake
But would never see the snake
Contacting you was a mistake
You've given me a headache
I remember asking if I was a mistake
You replied no
But everyday I feel unknown
Maybe the condom wasn't on right
Maybe the condom was on to tight
I know it isn't right to push people away
But I do it anyways
It doesn't phase me
Until I lay in my bed
Bullets grazing my head
Until I feel like i'm dead
Thinking I should give up instead
Pinned down by the demons in my head