Polaris - The Death of Me Album Lyrics

At the mantle of the heart, a river flows inside
We drain ourselves in steady streams, until the river runs dry
At times these tides define us, deny us of ourselves
A finite source of optimism that leaves a hollow shell
And as the seasons pass, and winter's numbing cold gives way to pain
We light these fires to sit beside as we pray like hell for rain

But when the night grows cold, and when the fire fades
At the hour before the dawn, the last embers burn til day
It's all I hang my hope upon you can't take that away from me

Every morning in the mirror I see my worst enemy reflected in me
Cause I'm a born unbeliever, a cynical soul, I can only trust as far as I see

But every time I close my eyes, I'm who I used to be
I never thought I'd feel so cold, until the fire faded out in me

I've never felt so cold

Such sacrifice for so little to show
To learn these lessons I never wanted to know: that we will all die alone
And how my blood remains on the tip of the blade as it severs the flesh from the bone
So far beyond the below

I was there when they sowed the seed
I was there when the rats came out to feed
And when the rain came, it extinguished the flame in me

As I slept, the seeds of doubt were sown
I tore my heart apart for this, in hopes my light would grow

And I dreamt about a place where all our virtue could withstand
I woke in fright, appalled to find the blood was on my hands

But every time I close my eyes, I'm who I used to be
I never thought I'd feel so cold, until the fire faded out in me

I've never felt so cold

I've got a bone to pick with fate, 'cause fortune's failed me as of late
And thrown me in too deep, I've lost the plot from losing so much sleep
Oh can you tell me, can you tell me how to save my soul?
Sometimes I wish the ground would open up and swallow me whole

No cure for the lethargy
Overflowing nervous energy
Just can't be left alone
Wear me down to skin and bone (skin and bone)

'Cause I'm cocked like a shotgun (lock it and load)
I've got a bone to pick with everyone (hand me the rope)
It's been an endless vicious cycle of this

I've been up, I've been down every day
I've been thinking, am I always gonna be this way?
Tell me, am I a man or machine?
A slave to substance or a slave to routine, yeah

Save my soul
Can't stop me, can't stop me crawling down this rabbit hole
(Mercy) Save my soul
Oh, can you tell that I can't tell you who I am anymore?

Count me in, pull the pin, and I'm ready to go
(Do you feel like you're free when you lose control?)
No heaven above without a hell below
(What's your worth on the earth if you sell your soul?)

I'm only here because it's harder to feel than to numb what is real
But I know by now that this state of mind is just a waste of time
And it's turning me inside-out!

Say you'll miss me when I'm gone
Just to keep me hanging on
Til the bitter end

Here we go again
I've been up, I've been down every day
Something tells me I was always gonna be this way
We all need something to take off the edge
A little medicine, a week in a hospital bed

This is my lost cause state of mind
I hear them coming, and I'm running out of time

This is a place I know too well
Been down here a while, if you can't tell
And I have analyzed and tried my best to justify
The sorrow I have brought upon myself

Am I addicted to the misery, is this how I'll always be?
Grinding the salt into every wound?
Am I in love with all my ailments, glutton for punishment?
You can't trust me to be there for you

I thought I had this, I thought I had this all figured out
You'd think I'd learned from all the shit I f*cking screamed about
When there was sun I couldn't see for the clouds
Still climbing the walls of this well just to dive back down
Until I reached my rock bottom
Down to the marrow, bringing up the bad blood I'd forgotten
Is it me that's making me sick?
Been burning both ends of the wick

Am I addicted to the misery, is this how I'll always be?
Grinding the salt into every wound?
Am I in love with all my ailments, glutton for punishment?
You can't trust me to be there for you

I've got this cold black silhouette hanging like a marionette
Casting a shadow, a shade over me
Just a sick, sad, sorry mess, living like a masochist
Your worst impressions were right about me
Your worst impressions were right about me
Your worst impressions were right

I could ask you to stay, if you're feeling forgiving
I could live with the guilt, if you call this living
I could try to memorize each grain of sand
As it slips through my fingers, and falls from my hands
It took me longer than I'd care to admit
This life is only what I choose to make of it
And the only thing standing in-between happiness and myself
Was this depression I held so close to my chest

Am I addicted to the misery, is this how I'll always be?
Grinding the salt into every wound?
Am I in love with all my ailments, glutton for punishment?
You can't trust me to be there for you

I've got this cold black silhouette hanging like a marionette
Casting a shadow, a shade over me
Just a sick, sad, sorry mess, living like a masochist
Your worst impressions were right about me

Wasting a waning youth
Waiting for something to help me pull through
I never saw the sun through the clouds
I lost faith when the skies were falling down

This is a fall from grace. Can't bear the aftertaste
As you swallow all your pride, are you satisfied?

Every day, like a broken record. Every night is a pointless prayer for change
No reprieve. No peace, no release for your middle class rage

Everybody wants to sell you something. Everybody wants a piece of your mind
Bite your tongue and let the crowd speak for you. Head like a hole and a heart like a landmine

(Hey, hey) Is it any wonder that we end up this way?
(Hey, hey) Born with a crisis of identity
(Hey, hey) Is it any wonder that this happens all the time?
Got a head like a hole and a heart like a landmine

Time hits like a freight train. No paycheck can pay back the lost years spent ruminating
Just pain to be gained from your common sense fears
Everybody's wasting away here. Watch us bloom and decay

Cast to the side. No one heard you choking as you swallowed your pride
You say you're happy, but are you satisfied?

No restitution, until you understand
This world that left you cold will feed you shit til you bite the f*cking hand

So tell me where it hurts, if it hurts to be you. If it hurts to be used and abused
If you know where you don't want to be, all the heavy hearted, sing this with me

(Hey, hey) Is it any wonder that we end up this way?
(Hey, hey) Born with a crisis of identity
(Hey, hey) Is it any wonder that this happens every day?
Are we cursed and condemned to a life of misery?

So tell me where it hurts, if it hurts to be you. If it hurts to be used and abused
If you know where you don't want to be, all the heavy hearted, sing this with me
(Hey, hey) All the heavy hearted sing this with me
(Hey, hey) Cursed and condemned to a life of misery

I have lived and died to know that all we love we leave behind
These undertakings take us far from familiar and comfortable things
How much can one heart bear before it tears at the seams?
Is this not all we thought it would be?

Find your peace in a place unknown, and see the world in shades of monochrome
You don't have to walk alone, to know what it feels like when nowhere feels like home

Show me your skin, show me the fear inside your bones
Cause I've seen a darker side of man than you will ever know

When my lungs refuse to breathe, will you replenish the air in me?
When my eyes refuse to see what is standing in front of me

Find your peace in a place unknown, and see the world in shades of monochrome
You don't have to walk alone, to know what it feels like when nowhere feels like home

The streetlights sing me to sleep. the company that I keep
And all that keeps me sane and whole, will be the death of me

Get me out of here

Lend me your ear, I'll tell you what you need to know
You'll learn to breathe, when life has got its hands around your throat
There was a time, there was a place where I could say
That I was unafraid of what this meant to me

Find your peace in a place unknown, and see the world in shades of monochrome
You don't have to walk alone, to know what it feels like when nowhere feels like home

Can't you see I'm not your enemy?
Oh, what did we lose in the wreck?
What once held us together will only hold us back

I know the doubt in your eye: What do we do when the well runs dry?
Maybe our fear and our faith are just two edges of the same blade
So cut the bullshit, the lines that we drew
If this is all you want from me, then what am I to you?

Crush my spirit, use me for parts. We should have seen this coming from the start

The night forgives, and the day forgets
We paint ourselves in our past regrets

So why's it all come down to your plan? I can't be anything more than I am
I can't be what you see in your head. Do you know what you've put me through?

So come on and break me, just to make me feel something
You know I know that you hate me. This endless eye for an eye will only send us blind
Has it occurred to you that we're out of time?

This house is hostile. There are ghosts inside the walls
At night they scratch at my door
And rattle the chains that we place on what we can't control

The night forgives, and the day forgets
We paint ourselves in our past regrets

Every hour draws us nearer to the very thing we dread

Oh, what did we lose in the wreck?
What brought us here together will only send us back

Call me a fake, call me a liar, hold me accountable, blame me for everything
Tear me apart, make me a martyr, make me believe you hate me before you crown me king

At the mantle of the heart, a river flows inside
We drain ourselves in steady streams, until the river runs dry
At times these tides define us, deny us of ourselves
A finite source of optimism that leaves a hollow shell
And as the seasons pass, and winter's numbing cold gives way to pain
We light these fires to sit beside as we pray like hell for rain

But when the night grows cold, and when the fire fades
At the hour before the dawn, the last embers burn til day
It's all I hang my hope upon you can't take that away from me

Every morning in the mirror I see my worst enemy reflected in me
Cause I'm a born unbeliever, a cynical soul, I can only trust as far as I see

But every time I close my eyes, I'm who I used to be
I never thought I'd feel so cold, until the fire faded out in me

I've never felt so cold

Such sacrifice for so little to show
To learn these lessons I never wanted to know: that we will all die alone
And how my blood remains on the tip of the blade as it severs the flesh from the bone
So far beyond the below

I was there when they sowed the seed
I was there when the rats came out to feed
And when the rain came, it extinguished the flame in me

As I slept, the seeds of doubt were sown
I tore my heart apart for this, in hopes my light would grow

And I dreamt about a place where all our virtue could withstand
I woke in fright, appalled to find the blood was on my hands

But every time I close my eyes, I'm who I used to be
I never thought I'd feel so cold, until the fire faded out in me

I've never felt so cold

At the mantle of the heart, a river flows inside
We drain ourselves in steady streams, until the river runs dry
At times these tides define us, deny us of ourselves
A finite source of optimism that leaves a hollow shell
And as the seasons pass, and winter's numbing cold gives way to pain
We light these fires to sit beside as we pray like hell for rain

But when the night grows cold, and when the fire fades
At the hour before the dawn, the last embers burn til day
It's all I hang my hope upon you can't take that away from me

Every morning in the mirror I see my worst enemy reflected in me
Cause I'm a born unbeliever, a cynical soul, I can only trust as far as I see

But every time I close my eyes, I'm who I used to be
I never thought I'd feel so cold, until the fire faded out in me

I've never felt so cold

Such sacrifice for so little to show
To learn these lessons I never wanted to know: that we will all die alone
And how my blood remains on the tip of the blade as it severs the flesh from the bone
So far beyond the below

I was there when they sowed the seed
I was there when the rats came out to feed
And when the rain came, it extinguished the flame in me

As I slept, the seeds of doubt were sown
I tore my heart apart for this, in hopes my light would grow

And I dreamt about a place where all our virtue could withstand
I woke in fright, appalled to find the blood was on my hands

But every time I close my eyes, I'm who I used to be
I never thought I'd feel so cold, until the fire faded out in me

I've never felt so cold

Between the waves, they break like glass
Pastel skies that turn to grey, in whispers they ask:
Is there anybody out there? were you ever listening?

Tear away all the pieces left worth saving. I'm a ghost, I'm a broken entity
This is all I have from a life spent wishing, waiting, and I won't let go if you beg me to

Strain til you're barely breathing. pain, just to give it meaning
The blood we shed for these hollow endeavours: what is it worth if no one remembers?
If there's anybody out there, they were never listening

Tear away all the pieces left worth saving. I'm a ghost, I'm a broken entity
This is all I have from a life spent wishing, waiting, and I won't let go if you beg me to

Frail hands worked to the bone. No chance to buy back the life that we sold
Freedom, false as your hope.
Each will suffer the same. Our own rapture, our own judgement day
To no end we will burn, if we...

Turn away, cause you're far too late to save me. I'm just a shell of the man I used to be
This is all I have from a life spent wishing, waiting, and I won't let go if you beg me to

What is it worth if no one remembers?

At the mantle of the heart, a river flows inside
We drain ourselves in steady streams, until the river runs dry
At times these tides define us, deny us of ourselves
A finite source of optimism that leaves a hollow shell
And as the seasons pass, and winter's numbing cold gives way to pain
We light these fires to sit beside as we pray like hell for rain

But when the night grows cold, and when the fire fades
At the hour before the dawn, the last embers burn til day
It's all I hang my hope upon you can't take that away from me

Every morning in the mirror I see my worst enemy reflected in me
Cause I'm a born unbeliever, a cynical soul, I can only trust as far as I see

But every time I close my eyes, I'm who I used to be
I never thought I'd feel so cold, until the fire faded out in me

I've never felt so cold

Such sacrifice for so little to show
To learn these lessons I never wanted to know: that we will all die alone
And how my blood remains on the tip of the blade as it severs the flesh from the bone
So far beyond the below

I was there when they sowed the seed
I was there when the rats came out to feed
And when the rain came, it extinguished the flame in me

As I slept, the seeds of doubt were sown
I tore my heart apart for this, in hopes my light would grow

And I dreamt about a place where all our virtue could withstand
I woke in fright, appalled to find the blood was on my hands

But every time I close my eyes, I'm who I used to be
I never thought I'd feel so cold, until the fire faded out in me

I've never felt so cold