Change Video (MV)

I cannot lie to myself
When I'm breaking apart
All these memories fade
But they're still breaking my heart
All the pieces are scattered
But you know ill remember
The mistakes that I made
And all the dreams that I shattered
Now all my friends that I have turned on
They will never come back
And all the people that I hurt
I know they'll never accept
That I am sorry for decisions that I made in the past
But leave the past in the past
And imma leave it at that
This life has been a double sided blade
That can penetrate
The amor that I put around my brain
I've been tryna cloud my doubt
With bowls of marijuana
Skipping questions I don't even wanna answer cuz
What the f*ck do I know
I'm watching movies just to pass the time
Never seem to go outside
Swallowed by my doom because my life is slowly on decline
Reaching for a higher sky
And wishing I was sober
Drinking for no reason
Just to pass out when its over
You can make me read a bible
Or find some f*cking scripture
That can tell me how to live
Or maybe see the bigger picture
Cuz if there is a god, then I think I need you more than ever
The man I am today is not the man I wanna be forever
Yeah imma take my time
Cuz I'm to dizzy and I cant remember
How I lost my ways
I hope this feeling doesn't last forever
Words still linger in the back of my throat
But they will never even listen to a song that I wrote
Yeah imma take my time
And try to learn to accept
All of the messed up lies
That I have learned to reject
And all the times I said Id change when I know that I wont
Just stop requesting for a change and remember I don't
Yeah imma take my time
Cuz I'm to dizzy and I cant remember
How I lost my ways
I hope this feeling doesn't last forever
Words still linger in the back of my throat
But they will never even listen to a song that I wrote
Yeah imma take some time
And try to learn to accept
All of the f*cked up lies
That I have learned to reject
And all the times I said Id change when I know that I wont
Just stop requesting for a change and remember I don't
Bitch
So I'm gonna take my time
Cuz I'm to dizzy and I cant remember
How I lost my ways
I hope this feeling doesn't last forever
Words still linger in the back of my throat
But they will never even listen to the songs that I wrote
Yeah imma take some time
And try to learn to accept
All of the f*cked up lies
That I have learned to suppress
And all the times I said Id change when I know that I wont
So stop requesting for a change and remember I don't, yeah