Let me tell a story 'bout a boy named Brian
This is not a fairy tale, no, that's not what I'm implying
This is really not the type of rhyme, writing 'bout flexing
Got some bitches on the phone
But I'm really not replying type shit
With the clique, and we going out to get ourselves a drink
To to the fast lane, might make the pedal f*ckin' sick
Bumping Lil Wayne, feeling like we ain't got time to think
Cigarettes, feeling like we be the kings
Got to the party 'bout 11:28
Went up to the bartender asking for some Bombay
No mixer, straight up, so you know I'm getting wasted
Then I realized I ain't even bring my paper
Might know it should be seen, lose it like I'm Charlie Sheen
Lookin' like them wipe panicking 'cause now my glass is clean
Talking to the bartender, "Sorry sir, I'm just a teen"
That's when I finally met the girl of my f*ckin' dreams
Ain't no game that I play when it comes to
Getting that kitty out the cage for my night go
Drive to the store just to buy a f*ckin' mattress
If that can mean she gon' end up on my nitrous
Back to the story and now I'm talking to this girl
I'ma call her Tracy and she looking like dessert
She noticing that I'm trussing, then she asked me, "What for?"
And I told her everything, and she gave me three fours
She said, "Where you wanna go?" and I told her, "I don't know"
"Do you got a girlfriend? That don't really matter, though"
I'm like, "Oh shit," thinkin' 'bout where this gonna go
So I proceed, man's never did this shit before
Back to her place now, tryna get my thing up
2 AM, whiskey dick, 80% discount
So I had to go down, cruising down to poon town
Making sure I put that bitch's frown on upside-down
Getting pretty wet, sweat running down her neck
And the kitty so cute, I wanna keep it as a pet
She so clean, man, that pussy smell like honeydew zest
Finally getting hard, so you know what's finna happen next
Ain't no game that I play when it comes to
Getting that kitty out the cage for my night go
Drive to the store just to buy a f*ckin' mattress
If that can mean she gon' end up on my nitrous
Struggling to put the Jimmy on
Turning red, I feel like a million
Then she getting on top and your boy just start to feel hysteria
"Bump and Grind" playing on the stereo
When I told her, "It's my first time"
And she told me, "Baby, it's fine, I don't mind"
She held my hand and it was intertwined
My god, it was nothing like what I had in my mind
Now it's time to put it in, baby, now it's primetime
This is where the fun begun
Heard her moan and I'm feeling like I'm 'bout to f*ckin' cum
Heard a knock, now your boy's got to go and f*ckin' run
Then I made a jump, heard the loudest scream ever
It was from her f*ckin' mom, ay
Called Mike on the team, said I need to leave the scene
He then picked me up, told him 'bout the girl that did the deed
Even said her name, then he asked if he could take a peek
Jumped out his f*ckin' seat, turns out I f*cked his sis