Rightful Disciple - Jordan Year Lyrics

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Hey, hey, hey, hey I'm 23 now kids
Please don't look up to me
Jordan Year
I know I got a buzz to beat
As more appear
I wonder if they're loving me
Behind my back stabbing with all of the cutlery
It's f*ckery
In a world of all this fake shit I wonder am I something seen
Or am I just hanging on by my Dungarees
If I blow up someday, it's lucky me

I'll appeal to the masses from this Sunday seat
These are all raw thoughts under a sunny tree
Jeez all jaws drop when I'm on the beat
Please mom don't call when I'm on the beat
Cuz right here is where I want to be
To my dad I hardly speak
Cuz I have all these dreams
Where artists leak
Music and it's all discreet
They use it
But that's all they see
Uhh, uhh, uhh
Not the person behind it
Cuz their verses are blinding
Every word that they're rhyming
It ain't worth it if you hurting your momma
We ain't perfect cuz we purchase the ganja
Just to slurp on the ramen
Man, we surfing on dry land, get it?
We resurface for shaolin
It is never a challenge
Manage the money we countin'
Hundreds and thousands
While this falcon hunting for talent
We ain't never tucking our talons
Man, it must be my balance

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, yea, yea
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, yea, yea
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, yea, yea

Hey, hey, hey, hey I'm 23 now kids
Please don't look up to me
Jordan Year
I know I got a buzz to beat
As more appear
I wonder if they're loving me
Behind my back stabbing with all of the cutlery
It's f*ckery
In a world of all this fake shit I wonder am I something seen
Or am I just hanging on by my Dungarees
If I blow up someday, it's lucky me

But it's all for free
And it's on repeat
I just give it to my fans
Cuz honestly
If they wanting me
I make sure they fed when I forgot to eat
When I forgot to sleep
I make sure they dreamt
Cuz this muse is calling me
And my music is all they see
So pardon me
If I change for the weather
Will you fall for me?

Yo man this shit is too wild
I never thought I'd be here
I made a few mistakes that derailed me
And costed me my future
For awhile I was depressed
But, I always felt that music was my therapy
I would write when I'm stressed and somehow it'd calm me down
See in high school, my parents were going thru a divorce and I would just sneak out
On the days I couldn't handle it
I would go to the park by my house, open my sunroof and stare at the sky
Listening to beats, freestyling, shit sometimes I was there for a cry
It was my release
Music was somewhere to hide
The stories I would tell,
Embellishing my own experiences or exaggerations of my feelings
About not feeling useful
That I was only good at a lot of things
But not great at one job
The only thing to ever stay consistent in my life was my drive to create music
I guess it was meant to be
For everything to happen the way it did
Cuz I was meant to speak
For music my heart was meant to beat
Mentally I named myself Disciple
Cuz it feels like this message was sent to me
Ya know growing up I was very religious
And although I've strayed from my spirituality I still believe what my pastor told me as a child
He said he saw great things in me and that I was put on this earth to make a difference
He didn't know what it was and at the time I didn't either