So I dip this pen in arsenic again
And drag first drafts of final words
Across the pale skin which has forgotten the taste of daylight
When I was young, my veins were black
And goddamn, don't we all look so young tonight
Shrouded in enough shadow
That I might discard all
But these teeth in a hungry Cheshire Grin
And the rest will fade away before I will miss it
And it is all coming faster than it can be written
I close my eyes and become oil-spill
Iridescent in the glow of that which we loved
Once, burning. And there is a man
Who wears brass knuckles like wedding rings
In the corner, but he doesn't see me
In a past life, I think I was a bass guitar
My grandmother sat me down and told me, "they're not listening
You have to make them feel you." And I know now
That we might be felt before our absence
If only our flesh set itself alight every time we wished it so
But after all, we kept freezing until the cold taught us to undress the darkness
And force its apology for a crowd
But it is rising, and still rising now
And everything I own that wants me dead is in bed with me
And when the lights are out, the shine and sting of thin metal
Curl into the nape of my neck, seeking shelter until morning
And before I know it, I have killed enough time
That time wants to get even, so I stand on a stage
And practice the art of disappearing into skin which is not yours
But is somehow taken from you until you become small
And doubt your ability to say no to anything that might hurt
But I am still on this stage, and I am bleeding now
Sour roses and hot mouths fill my palms as they empty my stomach
And the eyes want a taste
In a past life, we might have been holy
Strangers ask to kiss my scars in the hopes of tasting something righteous
For the very first time
Who am I to refuse them? As I bleed so willingly
Upon every page that will have me
And in the dream
A woman comes, but I know she is not there
She undresses the monster, and lays with it until it becomes warm
And the poison ink runs dry