The Stragglers - I'm Having An Affair Lyrics

I'm having an affair
I keep complaining that my life's not fair
I'll blame it on quarantine
The same routine
And that I'm constantly looking at screens
I'm having an affair
I'm gonna find the perfect home wrecker
Maybe a divorcé
On St. Patrick's Day
I know my colleague's always looking my way
Well I just got back from my daughter's dance class
Her teacher sure has a perfect round ass
Don't try this at home
It takes guts
If you're having an affair
Well I had an affair
I lost everything it's just not fair
I lost my beautiful wife
Ruined my son's life
For a cup of fun and meaningless nights
Oh I had an affair
People said we were the perfect pair
But like a movie scene
She broke the window screen
And threw my G.I. Joes into the street
It's a weekday, I'm back from my favourite bar
It helps me forget things I've done so far
I've got cans full of cigarette butts
As I wallow away in my rut
Don't try this at home
It takes guts
If you're having an affair