It feels like I've been alone too long,
With no girls around
My mamma's wondering.
Thinking of some way,
to release it.
I looked in the kitchen,
Saw some Crisco Oil,
And that's when my bladder started to boil,
Ooooooh yeah.
Ow, Ow, Ow!
(Uh oh!)
Ow, ow, ow!
(Oh God! What did I just do?)
No one wanted to be with me,
Had to make my dream come true,
I wanted to hump something,
I didn't know what to do.
It seemed like a good idea,
And no one else was around,
I stuck my weenie in a bottle,
And now I can't get it out!
Stuck my weenie in a bottle today,
Gonna shove it up there all the way.
I stuck my weenie in a bottle,
Oh no,
Can, can, someone come help me out?
It's turning purple,
All the feelings gone,
Now where did I put that friggin' phone?
Dialing 9-1-1!
Please pick up!
I'm in a lot of pain!
This was supposed to feel good,
Now I'm suffering,
Oh, please answer!
[Emergeny Services]
Denver 911, what is your emergency?
Ow, Ow, ow!
[Emergency Services]
Hello?
Ow, ow, ow!
[Emergency Services]
Sir, what seems to be the problem?
No one wanted to be with me,
Had to make my dream come true,
I wanted to hump something,
I didn't know what to do.
[Emergency Services]
Go on!
It seemed like a good idea,
And no one else was around,
I stuck my weenie in a bottle,
And now I can't get it out!
[Emergency Services]
You stuck your weenie in a bottle,
Oh my!
You must feel really lonley, guy.
You stuck your weenie in a bottle,
That's a first!
Don't worry sir,
We're sending somebody out!
Hey Pam, this guy's got his weenie stuck in a bottle!
[Pam]
No way!
[Emergency Services]
He does!
HAHAHAHAHA!
Wait, wait...
Sir, we're sending somebody out.
AHAHAHAHAHHAHAAH!
[Police]
He's in here,
Let's break the door down!
They break the door down.
[Police]
Oh my God!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!
[Emergency Services]
No one wanted to be with him,
Had to make his dream come true,
He wanted to hump something!
I didn't know what to do!
[Police]
It seemed like a good idea,
And no one else was around,
He stuck his weenie in a bottle--
And now I can't get it out!
[Policeman]
Ok kid, relax
We're going to get this thing off of ya!
OK, get ready,
PULL!
OWWWW!!
Stuck my weenie in a bottle today,
Now, now, now I can't get it out!